shuttlecock XXIV: it's the little swings - Page 7 - U2 Feedback

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Old 02-24-2019, 03:16 AM   #91
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Jesus
I'm waiting here boss
I know you post as Lazarus
But your movie takes aren't free?

Your son, Lance
Used to post bout movies
He's in charge of soothing
His mother (who's a huge whore)
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Old 02-24-2019, 04:53 AM   #92
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I recall a time, when I started posting in here and trying to get in with this crew, how fucking stressed I was trying to be accepted and liked.

I'm not sure if this is true or not, but I feel like Lance never liked me. This upset me for a long time, because as many people can say, I'm a pretty great dude. This doesn't upset me anymore however, I think because I love myself more, and so I'm less worried about what people I've never met on the internet think of me. And it might be wrong. I know LMP didn't like me for a time, but we met in person and I think we got to know each other more and understood each other more and we had a great time together. It's funny how much I've grown up and also grown to like and appreciate myself. Goes for many things other than just in here, but yeah. It's a nice reflection. It's probably also got a lot to do with the fact that back years ago this community was one of the few things I had, now I've got a lot of community outside of here.

I'm very happy to have been part of this community for so long. It's been very special, even if the magic has all but gone these days. I've stayed at Laz's place and had insane amounts of fun hanging out with him and his friends. Imps and I message each other regularly.

I love you all.

It is good to practice gratitude.

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Old 02-24-2019, 10:04 AM   #93
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a lot of folks here seem to have really hated me right around the time i had stopped posting for about a year or two because i had joined the army.

based on some of the posts in the horribly-titled "hip hop purists" thread i started back in the day. there's even one post in particular by someone who's still a regular here where they openly say they're thankful i'm gone because i was an irritating little kid who they don't care about at all (despite specifically writing a post about how much they dislike me long after i was gone). not going to call that person out specifically since either their opinion seems to have changed by now, or they do a damn good job of hiding it and i'm not looking for apologies or equivocation or anything. but coming back after reading that and a whole bunch of similar but less-harsh posts ("fuck that guy, he was an idiot, just look at this stupid thread title") put me in a similar space of wanting to be liked and wanting to show that i wasn't that little kid that everyone apparently couldn't stand. so yeah, i feel your post pretty hard cobbler.

luckily for the sake of my own mental health, now i've learned to not give a shit about what anyone thinks and openly embrace your collective disdain of me
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Old 02-24-2019, 10:23 AM   #94
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I came back here because I felt that I missed a lot of music in 2018. That was not entirely my fault; work got crazy, and then I was nearly killed in the fall and it derailed me for a while. I am still very busy at work and can only log on here once in a while, but I'm hoping it's worth checking back in from time to time.
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Old 02-24-2019, 10:28 AM   #95
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then I was nearly killed in the fall .
Dude, you can't just leave that out there with no further info...what the hell happened?
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Old 02-24-2019, 10:45 AM   #96
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I was hit by a car while riding a bicycle. It was a hit-and-run and they never located the person who did it. I broke nine bones in my face and skull as well as my thumb. Bono ain't got shit on me.
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Old 02-24-2019, 12:34 PM   #97
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Wow, scary.
I assume you're OK now?
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Old 02-24-2019, 12:39 PM   #98
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I was fortunate that I did not need surgery on my face/head, only the thumb, so by and large yes. The thumb is still not in great shape, but it is in one piece again and has most of the range of motion, even if the strength isn't there and the pain has not receded. I have some lingering nerve damage in my face, and it is unclear how much feeling I am going to regain in my teeth/nose/sinuses, but otherwise things are fine. No permanent brain damage beyond the initial concussion, and my face is pretty much back to where it was aside from some minor scarring around my eye. Only other scarring is on my knees, but that was just from skin loss. No breaks/tears there.
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Old 02-24-2019, 02:56 PM   #99
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Glad you're still with us, JD. Hopefully you'll continue to recover.
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Old 02-24-2019, 03:32 PM   #100
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Jesus christ dude. Fuck.
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Old 02-24-2019, 03:52 PM   #101
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Holy shit, JD. There's no justice in this world sometimes, but I'm happy that you're alive and on the mend.
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Old 02-24-2019, 03:57 PM   #102
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I was hit by a car while riding a bicycle. It was a hit-and-run and they never located the person who did it. I broke nine bones in my face and skull as well as my thumb. Bono ain't got shit on me.

Damn man, that's terrible. I ride a bike around the city a lot and I've had my share of close calls, always on account of drivers being horribly negligent. It's a special kind of asshole who can just drive away after hitting someone.
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Old 02-24-2019, 04:28 PM   #103
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My posting has actively turned at least one poster (LMP) away from the forum and there's probably been more. I regret the way I handled those situations. Impy threw some personally insulting posts my way in the past that were wholly uncalled for, so I'm alright with that bridge being burned, but for the most part I really do try to improve as a person and approach the internet with kindness to the best of my ability. I fall short all the time, but there have been incremental improvements.

Looking back, I was just a really opinionated son of a bitch and that's not easy to work with. I also said a lot of ignorant and homophobic shit based in my religious upbringing that I've grappled with. Never look up my old posts, please. I have a friend, not on his board, who I was very close with and hurt because of my narrow perspective when I was like 16. We've reconciled since, but it took a long time.

As far as the small group of posters remaining on this site, I care about you all and think of you as friends. I don't know if that feeling is fully reciprocated, but that's not the point. My attitude is that as part of a social species, I should leave myself open to helping others and being hurt. So I guess the worst thing about people leaving because of shit I've said is that I can't make up for it with them. But I can be a better person to everyone that's still around. That's especially important as I raise a daughter. I kind of suck even still, but I'm always looking to suck less.
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Old 02-24-2019, 07:56 PM   #104
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That's all you and any of us can do, is try to be aware and be better going forward, but for the record I've never had an issue with you at all!!

While we're all getting a bit sentimental... I'm doing the Shitbox Rally later this year. This might ring a bell, I've done it twice before. I am driving a shitbox car, worth less than $1,000 (so $720 or less for you seppos) from Melbourne to Townsville, 3,614km (or 2,245 miles for you seppos) in seven days.

Here's our route - dotted lines signal off-road.



It raises money for the Cancer Council Australia. I think every human has a story about cancer, whether it's affected a direct family member or just someone they know of. My mum is the closest one to me - she has beaten breast cancer twice! And my pa succumbed to brain cancer, though he was in his mid-80s so he'd had a good run.

Anyway me and one of my best mates are trying to raise $6,000 ($4,290 for you seppos) before we head off. If you've got even a dollar to spare it would be hugely appreciated

Link is here: https://2019spring.shitboxrally.com....cjISRB9ayzqWYw
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Old 02-25-2019, 10:34 AM   #105
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shuttlecock XXIV: it's the little swings

I never left. I just almost never post anything - lots of reading and lurking. I also used to care what people thought of my posts and now not so much.

One thing that I think is weird and might just be me is I still think of people how I did when I was a more regular poster. Like I still imagine Cobbler is being a teenager even though I know he’s not. I still imagine Laz posting in Dream Out Loud (that’s the writing/creativity subforum, right?) even though I know he doesn’t. I still imagine Axver caring about U2.

One other thing is when I’m working on writing music that I never finish, I always try to think of what people on here would say, since I don’t think I know another group of people who put so much stock in lyrics.
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