Religion is the Black Hole of the Soul
chapter 12
He was sitting in the back seat of his family's car. The trees were saluting upwards. Buildings stretched to reach for the sky. Everything fought the effects of gravity in an attempt to reach for the sun and shake its ethereal rays. HE would have, if he had the strength. he had the amorphous shape of a jelly fish. the only thing keeping his body from collapsing was the onerous full body cast he had been sentenced to wear almost a year ago. the one he tried to conceal with loose clothing, but still made him look like he was walking with the hanger still in his clothes. they were driving fast, over the posted 55mph speed limit. and yet he felt as if he were watching the end of a tradic movie were the director cut into slow motion and the cadence of life paused in remorse for the fallen protagonist. A song came on. the beginning started with a click. he thought that that was probably the sound his vertebrae made when it was fractured. almost silent and yet a prophetic catalyst of the vehemence the was to come. then another click and his back surged with pain. A third crack from two drumsticks, just like the three stress fractures that had disabled him, and shattered his dream of playing professional baseball, and the song entered! The song began with the gentle equanimity of a monk. it was heard not through his ears but his eyes, heart and soul. he thought that there was some sort of apocalyptical sign in the guitar. a sign that things were heading towards the end of something and the beginning of something else. what it was he did not know. the song swallowed him. 'IS IT GETTING BETTER?" A soothing yet diligent voice sung with a passion that was hidden behind a stained glass. But the voice didn't sing, it spoke. it spoke directly to him! the eyes of the song knew more about him than anyone else. "OR DO YOU FEEL THE SAME?" The question was asked not in search of an answer, because the song already knew it. It was asked as a way of raising the awareness of its listener, of broaching the dilemma into the light. "WILL IT MAKE IT EASIER ON YOU NOW YOU GOT SOMEONE TO BLAME?" to the left of the highway he saw a desolate chuch in great disrepair. "YOU SAY ONE LOVE, ONE LIFE, WHEN ITS ONE NEED IN THE NIGHT, ONE LOVE, YOU GET TO SHARE IT, IT LEAVES YOU BABY IF YOU DON'T CARE FOR IT." The song was not intended to entertain, it was a didactic dissertation. A paradigm for life. he wondered who the singer was? The song did not belong in this abject world. it was an anachronism from a distant utopian society looking back at a primal world. Was the radio even on? or was he hearing things? the lights on the dashboard were not on, but it had a short in the circuit and the lights never came on. Was he hearing things?
He needed some fresh air and opened the window and looked up at the clouds. Staring at them he noticed that they assumed shapes, whether it was fabricated by his imagination or by his boredom, he did not know. A breeze blew in accord with the surgence of drums from the song. He now realized that somehow in some miraculous manor that the song was the artist and govenor of the clouds above him. The large cloud divided itself, and through what he judged to be an unnatural meiosis, they formed a nebulous shape above him! The distortion came into proper proportion and it was. . . it was a man!!! An eloquent man with a beard and long white hair and soothing eyes. he was mesmerized! The song now accosted the secular shape in the sky, violently and yet still under control. "DID I DISAPPOINT YOU? LEAVE A BAD TASTE IN YOUR MOUTH? YOU ACT LIKE YOU NEVER HAD LOVE AND YOU WANT ME TO GO WITH OUT!!" He had never heard this song before and yet he felt as if it were an old love letter wriiten to him years ago that he had read a hundred times. It was as if the song was a part of him, an innate suppostition of his mind. There was a presence that could only be felt, but not seen. "WELL ITS TOO LATE TONIGHT TO DRIVE THE PAST OUT INTO THE LIGHT!! WERE ONE! BUT WERE NOT THE SAME, WE GET TO CARRY EACH OTHER, CARRY EACH OTHER, ONE!" And with that the song ordained the image in the clouds. The shape consecrated the song! Above him, the cloud grew in height and width, it surged and spread every other cloud away from it with a fierce motion using the hands and arms it had just sprouted! It created a chasm all around it, the figure was surrounded by light escaping its despotic presence, exactly in the line of sight of the sun. Was it covering him from its paradoxical essence? The sun could give life and it could take your eyesight away, it could warm you or in subject you to its baneful radiation. The old man in the sky now conjured a staff in his left hand and set a small bird free. or was it just a small cloud? With the sun behind him and the aura of the rays leaping from the edges of the austere man's body, it looked as if he was speaking!! He was!! Something moved where his mouth would have been! The lips moved in concord with the lyrics of the song!! the apotheosis in the sky spoke to him! "HAVE YOU COME HERE FOR FORGIVNESS? HAVE YOU COME TO RAISE THE DEAD?" He rubbed his eyes, was he ill? This could not be happening? And yet nothing changed, except now the eyes of the old man looked straight through his. A strange sound from the song alternately appeared with his every heart beat, it sounded like a squeezing sound, and he felt his cold blood slither through his veins. His body felt trapped inside of the cast he lived in. He sucked in his stomach and knocked on his cast. It had a hollow sound. The lips of the old man grew tighter, they tensed, he looked angry now and assumed a burlesque pose. "HAVE YOU COME HERE TO PLAY JESUS TO THE LEPERS IN YOUR HEAD?" The clouds arm's seemed to fold, half expecting an aswer, half believing that there could not possibly be a sufficient reply. To the left on the shoulder of the road lay a dead possum, obviously run over not too long ago. Its head faced upwards, its eyes still wide open in shock, capturing the animals last moment before it was condemned. It seemed as if the possum noticed the abstruse shape in the clouds. the possum answered the old man's question using the heart, head and voice of the song! The singers benign voice now turned caustic, the reverberated question burned a hole in the heart of the patriarch above. "DID I ASK TOO MUCH!!! MORE THAN A LOT!!! YOU GAVE ME NOTHING NOW ITS ALL I GOT!!!" The car sped past the possum. he now looked to the right of him. in the car next to his he noticed a middle aged female. she was singing, in fact she was singing the same song that he was listening to. so the song WAS on the radio and not in his head. She must have felt his heavy stare because she looked right at him. She continued to sing, their eyes stuck to each others like glue. There was a brief moment of understanding, of companionship, they shared the same universe, the static universe of the soul, not of rocks, water and matter. She reassured him with her eyes. Still singing, only singing to him now, "WERE ONE, BUT WERE NOT THE SAME! WELL WE HURT EACH OTHER AND WE'LL DO IT AGAIN. YOU SAY, LOVE IS A TEMPLE, LOVE THE HIGHER LAW, LOVE IS A TEMPLE LOVE THE HIGHER LAW" the woman veered and exited the highway. In that brief moment he had never felt such an affinity towards another. He felt a bond and a closeness with her in that instant that most married couples probably would never experience in their life-time. Looking back up to the clouds he noticed a change, they were stirring and coalesced to form a new shape. The manifestation assumed a frightful metamorphosis!! The head grew horns! The staff turned into a pitchfork!! The rays of the sun turned a reddish-orange! The beard disappeared and the eyes took a ghastly piercing presence!! It was laughing at it's docile observant, with sharp copious teeth it declared its ascendancy over the world! Suddenly the song grew louder, and fire sprayed from the monstrous shape! "YOU ASKED ME TO ENTER AND THEN YOU MADE ME CRAWL! AND I CAN'T BE HOLDING ON TO WHAT YOU GOT, WHEN ALL YOU GOT IS HURT!!" the new shape had somehow formed from the previous incarnation. But it had been there all along, disguised as something good and pious. It grew and swelled, almost exterminating the light from the sun. But just then an extraordinarily large flock of birds flew towards the demonic shape. the wind picked up. And as the birds entered the vicinity of the malignant cloud, the shape evaporated in thin air!! Revealing the luminous sun and beautiful clear skies! the scene capsized his somber demeanor and he smiled for a moment. the song rejoiced in it's new companion!! "ONE LOVE! ONE BLOOD! ONE LIFE WE GET TO DO WHAT WE SHOULD! ONE LIFE! WITH EACH OTHER! SISTERS! BROTHERS! ONE LIFE WITH EACH OTHER, WE GOT TO CARRY EACH OTHER! CARRY EACH OTHER! ONE!!!" the guitar chords were as palpable as the air he was breathing. He leaned foward and gave his mother and father a hug. He finally noticed the tears that had been dripping down his face the whole time, leaving a bad taste in his mouth. The sun regained it's owner-ship of the sky. A group of three homeless men huddled together on top of an over-pass sharing a bottle of whiskey. Two birds ritually chased each other in the sky. The woman in the car ahead of them gave her driver a kiss on his cheek. The rhetoric of the song now turned to canonical passion bleeding out of every speaker!! AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
HHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! YEAH LOVE!! YEAH LOVE!!! His catharsis was complete, he had found a new religion!
(excerpt from; "RATHER GO BLIND!")
chapter 12
He was sitting in the back seat of his family's car. The trees were saluting upwards. Buildings stretched to reach for the sky. Everything fought the effects of gravity in an attempt to reach for the sun and shake its ethereal rays. HE would have, if he had the strength. he had the amorphous shape of a jelly fish. the only thing keeping his body from collapsing was the onerous full body cast he had been sentenced to wear almost a year ago. the one he tried to conceal with loose clothing, but still made him look like he was walking with the hanger still in his clothes. they were driving fast, over the posted 55mph speed limit. and yet he felt as if he were watching the end of a tradic movie were the director cut into slow motion and the cadence of life paused in remorse for the fallen protagonist. A song came on. the beginning started with a click. he thought that that was probably the sound his vertebrae made when it was fractured. almost silent and yet a prophetic catalyst of the vehemence the was to come. then another click and his back surged with pain. A third crack from two drumsticks, just like the three stress fractures that had disabled him, and shattered his dream of playing professional baseball, and the song entered! The song began with the gentle equanimity of a monk. it was heard not through his ears but his eyes, heart and soul. he thought that there was some sort of apocalyptical sign in the guitar. a sign that things were heading towards the end of something and the beginning of something else. what it was he did not know. the song swallowed him. 'IS IT GETTING BETTER?" A soothing yet diligent voice sung with a passion that was hidden behind a stained glass. But the voice didn't sing, it spoke. it spoke directly to him! the eyes of the song knew more about him than anyone else. "OR DO YOU FEEL THE SAME?" The question was asked not in search of an answer, because the song already knew it. It was asked as a way of raising the awareness of its listener, of broaching the dilemma into the light. "WILL IT MAKE IT EASIER ON YOU NOW YOU GOT SOMEONE TO BLAME?" to the left of the highway he saw a desolate chuch in great disrepair. "YOU SAY ONE LOVE, ONE LIFE, WHEN ITS ONE NEED IN THE NIGHT, ONE LOVE, YOU GET TO SHARE IT, IT LEAVES YOU BABY IF YOU DON'T CARE FOR IT." The song was not intended to entertain, it was a didactic dissertation. A paradigm for life. he wondered who the singer was? The song did not belong in this abject world. it was an anachronism from a distant utopian society looking back at a primal world. Was the radio even on? or was he hearing things? the lights on the dashboard were not on, but it had a short in the circuit and the lights never came on. Was he hearing things?
He needed some fresh air and opened the window and looked up at the clouds. Staring at them he noticed that they assumed shapes, whether it was fabricated by his imagination or by his boredom, he did not know. A breeze blew in accord with the surgence of drums from the song. He now realized that somehow in some miraculous manor that the song was the artist and govenor of the clouds above him. The large cloud divided itself, and through what he judged to be an unnatural meiosis, they formed a nebulous shape above him! The distortion came into proper proportion and it was. . . it was a man!!! An eloquent man with a beard and long white hair and soothing eyes. he was mesmerized! The song now accosted the secular shape in the sky, violently and yet still under control. "DID I DISAPPOINT YOU? LEAVE A BAD TASTE IN YOUR MOUTH? YOU ACT LIKE YOU NEVER HAD LOVE AND YOU WANT ME TO GO WITH OUT!!" He had never heard this song before and yet he felt as if it were an old love letter wriiten to him years ago that he had read a hundred times. It was as if the song was a part of him, an innate suppostition of his mind. There was a presence that could only be felt, but not seen. "WELL ITS TOO LATE TONIGHT TO DRIVE THE PAST OUT INTO THE LIGHT!! WERE ONE! BUT WERE NOT THE SAME, WE GET TO CARRY EACH OTHER, CARRY EACH OTHER, ONE!" And with that the song ordained the image in the clouds. The shape consecrated the song! Above him, the cloud grew in height and width, it surged and spread every other cloud away from it with a fierce motion using the hands and arms it had just sprouted! It created a chasm all around it, the figure was surrounded by light escaping its despotic presence, exactly in the line of sight of the sun. Was it covering him from its paradoxical essence? The sun could give life and it could take your eyesight away, it could warm you or in subject you to its baneful radiation. The old man in the sky now conjured a staff in his left hand and set a small bird free. or was it just a small cloud? With the sun behind him and the aura of the rays leaping from the edges of the austere man's body, it looked as if he was speaking!! He was!! Something moved where his mouth would have been! The lips moved in concord with the lyrics of the song!! the apotheosis in the sky spoke to him! "HAVE YOU COME HERE FOR FORGIVNESS? HAVE YOU COME TO RAISE THE DEAD?" He rubbed his eyes, was he ill? This could not be happening? And yet nothing changed, except now the eyes of the old man looked straight through his. A strange sound from the song alternately appeared with his every heart beat, it sounded like a squeezing sound, and he felt his cold blood slither through his veins. His body felt trapped inside of the cast he lived in. He sucked in his stomach and knocked on his cast. It had a hollow sound. The lips of the old man grew tighter, they tensed, he looked angry now and assumed a burlesque pose. "HAVE YOU COME HERE TO PLAY JESUS TO THE LEPERS IN YOUR HEAD?" The clouds arm's seemed to fold, half expecting an aswer, half believing that there could not possibly be a sufficient reply. To the left on the shoulder of the road lay a dead possum, obviously run over not too long ago. Its head faced upwards, its eyes still wide open in shock, capturing the animals last moment before it was condemned. It seemed as if the possum noticed the abstruse shape in the clouds. the possum answered the old man's question using the heart, head and voice of the song! The singers benign voice now turned caustic, the reverberated question burned a hole in the heart of the patriarch above. "DID I ASK TOO MUCH!!! MORE THAN A LOT!!! YOU GAVE ME NOTHING NOW ITS ALL I GOT!!!" The car sped past the possum. he now looked to the right of him. in the car next to his he noticed a middle aged female. she was singing, in fact she was singing the same song that he was listening to. so the song WAS on the radio and not in his head. She must have felt his heavy stare because she looked right at him. She continued to sing, their eyes stuck to each others like glue. There was a brief moment of understanding, of companionship, they shared the same universe, the static universe of the soul, not of rocks, water and matter. She reassured him with her eyes. Still singing, only singing to him now, "WERE ONE, BUT WERE NOT THE SAME! WELL WE HURT EACH OTHER AND WE'LL DO IT AGAIN. YOU SAY, LOVE IS A TEMPLE, LOVE THE HIGHER LAW, LOVE IS A TEMPLE LOVE THE HIGHER LAW" the woman veered and exited the highway. In that brief moment he had never felt such an affinity towards another. He felt a bond and a closeness with her in that instant that most married couples probably would never experience in their life-time. Looking back up to the clouds he noticed a change, they were stirring and coalesced to form a new shape. The manifestation assumed a frightful metamorphosis!! The head grew horns! The staff turned into a pitchfork!! The rays of the sun turned a reddish-orange! The beard disappeared and the eyes took a ghastly piercing presence!! It was laughing at it's docile observant, with sharp copious teeth it declared its ascendancy over the world! Suddenly the song grew louder, and fire sprayed from the monstrous shape! "YOU ASKED ME TO ENTER AND THEN YOU MADE ME CRAWL! AND I CAN'T BE HOLDING ON TO WHAT YOU GOT, WHEN ALL YOU GOT IS HURT!!" the new shape had somehow formed from the previous incarnation. But it had been there all along, disguised as something good and pious. It grew and swelled, almost exterminating the light from the sun. But just then an extraordinarily large flock of birds flew towards the demonic shape. the wind picked up. And as the birds entered the vicinity of the malignant cloud, the shape evaporated in thin air!! Revealing the luminous sun and beautiful clear skies! the scene capsized his somber demeanor and he smiled for a moment. the song rejoiced in it's new companion!! "ONE LOVE! ONE BLOOD! ONE LIFE WE GET TO DO WHAT WE SHOULD! ONE LIFE! WITH EACH OTHER! SISTERS! BROTHERS! ONE LIFE WITH EACH OTHER, WE GOT TO CARRY EACH OTHER! CARRY EACH OTHER! ONE!!!" the guitar chords were as palpable as the air he was breathing. He leaned foward and gave his mother and father a hug. He finally noticed the tears that had been dripping down his face the whole time, leaving a bad taste in his mouth. The sun regained it's owner-ship of the sky. A group of three homeless men huddled together on top of an over-pass sharing a bottle of whiskey. Two birds ritually chased each other in the sky. The woman in the car ahead of them gave her driver a kiss on his cheek. The rhetoric of the song now turned to canonical passion bleeding out of every speaker!! AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
HHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! YEAH LOVE!! YEAH LOVE!!! His catharsis was complete, he had found a new religion!
(excerpt from; "RATHER GO BLIND!")
