"MSN," and "while you were out"

[Zoomerang96]

MSN

how you glide
you didnt realize
what you got for free
they want you to pay for life

great things are in store
if youd just pay a little more
why not upgrade
clean their dishes, pay their bills, "its getting better every day!"

your almost out of room
the monitor says you should be gone
but theyre out of tune
they'll be the hungry, bloody and robbed

theyd take every last dime if they could
search your pockets so deep they tore
they dont know the score
but your blind, and willing to pay some more

your so gutless as they attack
the time has come to stand together
beat the evil in its tracks
and take the power back

-----

While you were out

while you were out
you didnt remember
to pick up your child
he's wet and cold, its december

your child is just there
you dont care

while you were out
your lawn wasnt getting cut
the money you earned wasn't enough
now the taxman is knocking on your door
you werent prepared
but you were informed

while you were out
someone moved in
he waited for the right time
you turned your back, and he committed his crime

while you were out
the electric chair was set on fire
you thought your child was getting what he deserved
but you didnt bother to inquire

now your son is dead
there is plenty to remember
why did you have him, and what was he all about?
you never took the time to find out
while you were out

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-deathbear

 

[Screaming Flower]

bear that second one made the hairs stand-up on the back of my neck. it's incredibly chilling, yet heartbreaking. is it about alton coleman?

 

[wannabe]

that second one is extremely chilling

I like the line take the power back in MSN.

 

[Zoomerang96]

woah, that does feel weired...

i wasnt even planning on writing that, i wanted to make a "love" poem. ofcourse, it turned into something very much different.

very creepy, but ah well. if it means that to ya, cool. i really didnt intend for it though.

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-deathbear

 

[The Wanderer]

there is plenty to remember
why did you have him, and what was he all about?
you never took the time to find out


I didn't know anything about the coleman thing, unfortunately it doesn't have to be about someone in particular, because it happens all the time, apply it to anyone or anything

(btw deathbear, this brought to mind one of the truly great songs of recent years, "true love waits" and that line about "lollipops and crisps," Thom mentioned the lyrics to the song once on the official website: mum left her 8 year old locked in for a week with lollipops and crisps. she had to work or forgot or something)



[This message has been edited by The Wanderer (edited 04-26-2002).]

 

[Zoomerang96]

actually to be honest i dont even know about the coleman person your talking about. you should explain.

really that one was just a single mothers neglect of their one child. she tries hard to make everything work, but shes falling short.

her son didnt get what he deserved, but it wasnt even really his mothers fault. its just a terrible situation where both people lose.

 

[Screaming Flower]

alton coleman was executed this morning in ohio. there was an article about him yesterday in the chicago tribune. one of the arguments is that due to his horrific childhood he suffered terrible psychological scarring and should have been spared the death penalty. his mother left him in a garbage can when he was a baby and he was raised by his grandmother who sexually abused him. it's a horrible story. for some reason your second poem reminded me of that story.
http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/nationworld/showcase/chi-0204250300apr25.story?coll=chi%2Dnews%2Dhed

 

[BabyGrace]

wow bear that second one hit me in the gut..I didn't know about the Coleman thing either, but I think MIB is right, it's a coincidence but probably because it far too common.


now your son is dead
there is plenty to remember
why did you have him, and what was he all about?

that is heartbreaking.

the picture you put together in MSN is so truthful. funny, I read this line: "great things are in store" as "great things are in stores" which I thought made sense too. I love the last stanza.. injustice never wins as long as people keep the will to fight.




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tomorrow's just an excuse away
so I pull my collar up and face the cold, on my own...

 

[ABEL]

lol @ the MSN poem bear. You should send it to microsoft! Not that they'd probably even read it, but someone might.

The only email address I found for hotmail, was one to report abuse too (abuse@hotmail.com)...now that would be funny if they opened and read that poem!

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Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.
-Albert Einstein

[This message has been edited by ABEL (edited 05-03-2002).]

 

[LarryMullen's POPAngel]

Excellent stuff, bear.



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Like a strand in the wind
In the web that is my own I begin again