defining my signature

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travu2

The Fly
Joined
Aug 5, 2000
Messages
278
Location
a sea of fossils
I was originally going to post this in U2girl's thread about signatures. It was going to be my signature, but I went off on a tangent (again) and decided to post it here. It is very very (VERY) rough.


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He engaged the letter jets, preparing to drop his tiny round shadow onto the alien landscape for the first time. The small bubble slowly emerged from the side of the large square craft, and glided silently out over those shifting blue meadows and feathered white trees lazily waving in the thin atmosphere. Several times, as he sat there in the confines of his climate-controlled space, scrolling through his array of optical sensors, he thought he saw little faces here and there in the uniform vegetation far below, like poisonous beetles boldly advertising their toxicity; every time he advanced on their apparent position, no matter how stealthy, they had disappeared.. dissolved into the hazy blue.
Some evenings he would hear a low rumbling, and after switching his cockpit to heat sensing mode, was able to witness a distant valley expelling its deadly gas; nothing had ever scared him as much as watching those brooding thermals bloom.
He passed under delicate archways of solemn gray, sometimes pausing to hover beside vast white cliffs where he could use his black lasers to carve out valuable samples for later testing. Through every habitat he passed, taking detailed notes, carefully but efficiently collecting pieces of that cubist pixosphere.

At the end of his expedition, he packed all of the samples away into the proper storage compartments and readied himself for lift-off. As he manned the controls of his giant square and pulled away from that placid surface, he took one last look back.. and noticed a trail of darker blue etched there in the atmosphere. It ended at the landing site, where he had been preparing for launch only minutes ago. It suddenly dawned on him that this was the winding path he had taken in his scouting bubble over the last several days. As he climbed higher, he thought he could begin to see the shapes of letters imposed over the contours of the landscape. A familiar curve here and.. yes! He could almost make out entire words now. Now, after days of methodical exploration, after beginning his final ascent, he had finally discovered the greatest mystery this planet had to offer, and it was a message to himself. All of the analyzing.. all of those nights crying himself to sleep.. if he had only taken the time...

This last thought was cut short as the craft slammed into the planet's orbiting shroud of silicon and ice, instantly pulverizing the block into an expanding halo of dust.

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This post was really just an excuse to use the word "pulverize."
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My god... pulverize. That's such a cool word. My thoughts were suddenly pulverized by a remembered encounter with a person who lovingly squeezed my shoulder..

[This message has been edited by travu2 (edited 10-23-2001).]
 
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That's a long sig...
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You know what I think of your writing, this is no exception...but good heavens, man, POST SOME MORE POEMS!!!!

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I have to say the ending is a little depressing. I don't know if I'm reading this piece right but it sounds to me as though it's a metaphor of the world as a printer, or something ("pixosphere"??). Or, I should say, the world as the production of the Great Printer.
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Very interesting.


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Love is the heartbeat of the universe
 
I was actually about to delete this and apologize to everyone. C'mon, you've got to admit it's pretty lame.
Recently I've been posting some stuff like this that is just spur of the moment. One reason is that I am extremely uptight about the quality of the stuff I write. I am never really happy with it. In art classes as a kid I always felt that if it was going to have my name on it, it had to be the very best I could do (I still think that's a good thing), but then I was afraid to just have fun being creative around other people and that doesn't really allow a person to grow, ya know? I want to cure myself of that by just posting one-offs like this. I know if I like something that I've written or not, and a post like this is not something I would normally consider good enough to share.. but I did it anyway!

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"You can hold on to something so tight
you've already lost it."
 
I liked some of your other stuff better. But "lame" is not a word I would use. You know you can always count on me as a cheering section.
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Love is the heartbeat of the universe
 
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In my opinion, you are 10 times the poet I am, and I want you to know that I really do appreciate all of the nice things you have said. These words represent a loss of energy from a 26-year old guy who is nevertheless glowing a little brighter.

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Honestly though, I don't think I'll be posting any "proper" poems here again.

[This message has been edited by travu2 (edited 10-23-2001).]
 
Originally posted by foray:
That is one depressing block of words.

foray

The one thing I find really depressing is that he's not planning to post any more poems.

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So wind blow through to my heart
So wind blow through my soul
 
Hey travu2, I hope you will consider re-posting your desert poem --- the one that you deleted shortly after posting a few months ago. It was an amazing piece and I'd love to see it again. (I read it while at work and when I got home I specifically logged on to comment on how great it was, but then I found it was gone!)
 
Wow, I'm surprised you remember that, and even more surprised that you liked it! I think that was in EYKIW. That wasn't really a poem, just some spontaneous thoughts in a thread about the monsoon season.
I didn't save it. I do remember a couple phrases and some of the imagery I used. If you want me to, I could just start from what I remember and write a new poem that I would email to you (it might take me quite a while). It's a subject I always enjoy writing about anyway. Just let me know.
You can reply here or send me an email.

travu2@hotmail.com

[This message has been edited by travu2 (edited 11-03-2001).]
 
Yes, yes! Write what you can, when you can. When you're ready, please please
e-mail it to me at cappy511@aol.com

Ya know, it's funny... if I had written that poem, I would have filed it away and probably not looked at it for a long time, but nevertheless I would have felt like I was storing away a cache of gold dust.

The words must come much easier to you than they do me.
 
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