Where did i go wrong

[girlhappy]

I am writing this out of desperation. I have to confess: i live in the song Bad and it is very much actual for me. Isolation, ....you know the rest. The thing is,i really really dont have any luck in love. Paradox is that i feel about my self as a especially giving and caring person. (And it is confirmed by others, its not my ego)
But somehow, every guy on my way seems to be the wrong one.
Maybe i should be on the Smiths forum i can totally relate to the song There is a light that that never goes out. Apart from that, seems to me that my suffering really costs me a lot. I have friends, not to be ungreatfull, but there is a time when you really need that love and chemistry. When i look at Bono&Ali i see heaven. I just feel really isolated from natural feelings, i feel like in the desert, just have Joshua three to believe in...
Anyone?

 

[ZeroDude]

First off your not alone alot of us feel like this, but you know we have to get out of it, keep ourselves going, occupied atleast and thats it, all that I can say, don't worry, alot of the people here have their ears open to everyone.

 

[u2bonogirl]

I know what youre going through
I love having somebody to lavish myself and my love on, but I always had the wrong person

In the end i would end up feeling empty and totally alone. Like I had just wasted part of my life giving myself to the person.

Hang in there
There are people who will love you for your tender heart and willingness to love the way you do

 

[the soul waits]

You're not alone feeling like this

 

[Needle_Chill]

Never stop sharing your love and caring. Someday someone will really appreciate it and care for you the same way.

 

[For Honor]

Yes.

Try listening to "One" a few times.... that makes a lot of sense to me these days....

But you indeed are not alone....

 

[the rockin edge]

Yes.

Try listening to "One" a few times.... that makes a lot of sense to me these days....

But you indeed are not alone....

good advice, though that doesn't always work.

Girlhappy, I feel the same way sometimes

 

[girlhappy]

Thank you very much for understanding my pain. I feel so very much let down. I had this relationship and i thought that maybe this time i will be finally happy, but it is not my destiny. I know it really sounds not u2ey optimistic, but, maybe i am just not smart enough to choose someone normal like Bono did(Ali). I just feel like it is completely impossible to be happy in love.

 

[the soul waits]

Oh girl, I know how you feel - I used to feel like that, and man, does it ever suck.
You feel like a failure, and even though a relationship failed because of "the wrong guy", I'd still beat myself up over the fact that I chose that wrong guy, so always took the blame.
Makes you feel incompetent, frustrated, unappreciated, etc.
While you know that you're sweet, caring, intelligent, pretty etc.
So what the flip is wrong???

I had those inner dialogues for so long, i can't even tell you.
Then, one day, I made a resolution with myself to stay single, steer clear from all that relationship-drama for as long as I needed to.
I felt like I'd neglected myself and never really figured out who I was, what I wanted, etc... always was part of a relationship, ...and felt like I had to give some quality-time to myself for a change.

And now, I feel great! Love being single, finally have the group of friends I never had because I always spending time with a guy (sounds so lame but it's true, unfortunately) and a relationship is the last thing on my mind these days.

So, hang in there, focus inward and listen to what you want to do.

 

[OnFire]

Sounds like you've been in more than one or two bad relationships. The rock bottom feelings you have now at the end of your relationship may be the best time to take a good honest look at yourself and ask why you are drawn to these guys in the first place.

As a kind, caring, attractive (at least guessing from that tiny avatar pic) girl I'm sure you must have many nice guys interested in you. Maybe you don't even notice them. Is there someting in your giving nature that draws you to men who only take?

I'm not saying this is you for sure, it's just a phenomenon I've observed on numerous occasions.

 

[BrownEyedBoy]

Yes.

Try listening to "One" a few times.... that makes a lot of sense to me these days....

But you indeed are not alone....

It's amazing how spot on "One" is. I'm beginning to confirm that it is the best song EVER.

"Did I dissapoint you?
Leave a bad taste in your mouth,
You act like you never had love,
you want me to go without..."

...wow.

Hold on. Life has good things in store for all of us.

 

[dazzlingamy]

I hear you too.

What i think you need to do is not think '
ive missed out on love' or something like that, because love is all around you.

You need to be happy inside before you can have a relationship that will challenge you and force you to feel love like never before...

people sometimes cling to someone they know deep down is bad for them purely because they dont want to be alone. but aloneness is not a bad thing, its a part of your life where you find out who you are, and then you realise what you need and you will find it...

stay strong.

xx

 

[xtal]

I'm twenty seven and still haven't found what I'm looking for.

I've never had anyone true, real, or longlasting. Just flings.
It's like I sabotage it before it leaves ground. I am finding myself not believing love or marriage. It happens for the super lucky ones.
And the thing is, I'm not bad looking, I have money, a good personality, and I'm very smart. WTF is wrong WITH ME????
So no, you're not alone. I am much more pathetic and lonely than you.

 

[For Honor]

It's amazing how spot on "One" is. I'm beginning to confirm that it is the best song EVER.

"Did I dissapoint you?
Leave a bad taste in your mouth,
You act like you never had love,
you want me to go without..."

Some of our friends in the U2 Feedback » Still Haven't Found What You're Looking For? » Music on the Internet

forum found a great live version of ONE. I am not sure if the link still works, but I highly recommend it. It is great. I'm sure if the link doesn't work you can ask the people there for it again. That is what I would do.

Here is the link to the page with the live version of ONE - - unparralleled



Did I ask too much?
More than a lot?
You gave me nothing-
Now it's all I got.
we're one, but we're not the same
We hurt each other and we'll do it again...
You say,
''Love is a temple
Love the higher law.
Love is a temple
Love the higher law.''
You ask me to enter,
But then you make me crawl.
And I can't keep holding on
To what you got...
When all you got is hurt...


----------------------
and to think I didn't like this song the first time I heard it
----------------------

I hear you comin'.......

bangin', bangin' at the door....

 

[For Honor]

It happens for the super lucky ones.

I'm not going to lie - you are dead right. BUt that doesn't mean that you are not lucky enough. Love is a blessing, but don't ever count you out, be cause once you do, then you shut yourself out. You don't need love to be happy, but there is no reason to think your life is over if you don't have it, either.

We are all in this together, so don't forget that.
But your world is up to you.
So try to be happy

Easier said than done, I know.
But ZooC is here for you, if you ever need to let anything out.

Someone will always be around to ask you if it's getting better. And if it isn't, well, we'll still be waiting for you, for when it does get better.

 

[girlhappy]

I totally agree with xtal. Really, i am same as you are.I never had anything worthwhile. I also believe very much in what dazzlingamy said, rthat you have to be strong with your self first.
But, what if you are high emotional and emotions are what keeps you going, not your will?What abot us, who are not so rational?
Any thoughts?

 

[For Honor]

There are many differnt kinds of people.

Some love with their heart, others with their head. I suggest if someone wants to be happy, you've got to use your head, or be really lucky and find someone who does use their head, and make sure that person sincerely wants to be with you.


I don't really know what I have to say
Everyone has to be responsible, accountible for their feelings and actions, and there is no getting around that, no short cut. Just try to be as honest as possible, especially with yourself. That might be weird, but if you are sincere about your feelings, and not just sucked in by the moment, maybe things will be easier.

but I know that is easier said than done sometimes.




I realize that it is sort of... up in the air.
You can never really know if someone wants to be in love the way you do, unless they really show it and make it clear, over time.

It's always a risk, I guess.
But what are you loosing?

Enduring pain? Happiness is just a state of mind.



There are really a lot of things to be said.
Different people love differently, different expectations, wants and needs. But I think knowing yourself is half the battle. Once you know 'you', just make decisions from there - is this what I want, or not? How much of this can I afford to sacrifice, how much slack is there for this subject, and what are my core values that are unshakable.

Look I don't know a lot,and am just speculating.
ANd I don't even know how related that was to the question
But those are some things that I've thought about.

 

[Numb1075]

Well, it's a good thing you aren't a smackhead....Bad has been noted as having been about friends and fellow Irishmen struggling w/ heroin addiction

On a serious note, at least you are aware that love is the greatest gift in this world (there are some who refuse to realize this) and I'm sure that when the time is right, your time will come.