to make a move, or not to make a move, that is the question.

[GibsonGirl]

This is where all you fellow Interferencers turn into fish wives.

Anyway, here's my predicament - when I was fourteen, I went on a couple of dates with this guy in my grade. I broke it off, though, because I thought he was moving too fast. Plus, I didn't really want to have a boyfriend at that age. I've been fine without one ever since (it's not that guys haven't tried - I just never found anyone interesting enough. ) . But now, with my 18th birthday 20 days away, I can't help but feeling like I have some sort of emotional void within me as a result of my singleness...

And said guy appears to be liking me again. I think I like him too. He came down and sat next to me the other day, and told me I should really go to a party that's going on at this very minute. I had to politely decline because a.) I don't drink and b.) U2 tickets go onsale tomorrow (we all know U2 are far more important than smelly ol' boys I have to be refreshed for some serious page refreshing! ). And today, he was sitting very close to me during a school assembly. I mean mere centimetres away. Now, I may be getting the signals completely fooled up, but he seems to be acting the same way he did before he asked me out four years ago.

But here's the problem - I think he has a girlfriend at this point. I heard that they got into a fight not too long ago, but I really don't know the situation. Do I make a move and risk having him claim that he already has someone, or do I wait for him to do something first?

Guys say girls are hard to understand. I think it's the other way around.

 

[U2Girl1978]

This is where all you fellow Interferencers turn into fish wives.

Anyway, here's my predicament - when I was fourteen, I went on a couple of dates with this guy in my grade. I broke it off, though, because I thought he was moving too fast. Plus, I didn't really want to have a boyfriend at that age. I've been fine without one ever since (it's not that guys haven't tried - I just never found anyone interesting enough. ) . But now, with my 18th birthday 20 days away, I can't help but feeling like I have some sort of emotional void within me as a result of my singleness...

And said guy appears to be liking me again. I think I like him too. He came down and sat next to me the other day, and told me I should really go to a party that's going on at this very minute. I had to politely decline because a.) I don't drink and b.) U2 tickets go onsale tomorrow (we all know U2 are far more important than smelly ol' boys I have to be refreshed for some serious page refreshing! ). And today, he was sitting very close to me during a school assembly. I mean mere centimetres away. Now, I may be getting the signals completely fooled up, but he seems to be acting the same way he did before he asked me out four years ago.

But here's the problem - I think he has a girlfriend at this point. I heard that they got into a fight not too long ago, but I really don't know the situation. Do I make a move and risk having him claim that he already has someone, or do I wait for him to do something first?

Guys say girls are hard to understand. I think it's the other way around.

I think you should ask him out for a coffee(if that's what you drink) as friends and talk about life, who he's dating, etc. etc. No harm in trying.

You may be surprised.

 

[Windmilllane]

What are your feelings for this guy? Is a jerk who wants to get in your pants, or is he a decent guy who is really interested in you?

Move slowly. Get to know him first. If he acts like an asshole, move on. He's not right for you. If he is really sincere and kind and wants to get to know you, ask him what's his situation: Is he with his girlfriend or not?

Don't be afraid to ask. Otherwise, he is just playing you. You deserve better, GibsonGirl.

 

[GibsonGirl]

Re: Re: to make a move, or not to make a move, that is the question.

I think you should ask him out for a coffee(if that's what you drink) as friends and talk about life, who he's dating, etc. etc. No harm in trying.

You may be surprised.

Sounds like a good idea. If I can pluck up the courage to talk to him about the latter...

Originally posted by Windmilllane


What are your feelings for this guy? Is a jerk who wants to get in your pants, or is he a decent guy who is really interested in you?

Move slowly. Get to know him first. If he acts like an asshole, move on. He's not right for you. If he is really sincere and kind and wants to get to know you, ask him what's his situation: Is he with his girlfriend or not?

Don't be afraid to ask. Otherwise, he is just playing you. You deserve better, GibsonGirl.

Oh, he's a very decent guy. He's not one of those big, macho, look-how-many-girls-I-can-bag sorts. He's actually pretty sensitive. When I broke up with him a couple years ago, for instance, one of my friends said he called her after the deed was done and sounded extremely upset. He didn't attempt anything with anyone else for months after that... I don't think I've really ever gotten over the guilt I felt, doing that to him. We've been very casual friends ever since then. I've always sort of sensed that he still liked me, even though he has moved on to other people. That sense has been coming through even stronger lately. I'd love to talk to him about it, but I just really don't know how to bring up the subject with him... He hasn't mentioned anything about his girlfriend for weeks now, which is a bit odd. He was talking about her nonstop. I suppose I could always ask one of his friends about it, but that'll still end up getting back to him.

 

[martha]

Mebbe he's realized that you're the one he wants. If you want him, too, the gf is history.

You won't know anything until you ask.