Please help if you can with a prayer

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I know I've said this loads before, but thanks so much for taking the time to be there for me - it means a hell of a lot. Thankyou again. If I can ever do anything to help any of you, please let me know and I will try my best.

I hope you don't mind my ranting here, but I'm so angry and upset and feel so useless.

My sister has spoken to the hospital today, and for anyone who doesn't live in the UK, this is how bad the system is: she was told today, over the phone, that she can't have chemotherapy.

Prior to any of all this happening, my sister began bleeding heavily when she was 7 months pregnant... she went into hospital after she collapsed, unable to walk, and lovely, clever my little niece who was just 2 at the time, called me saying "Mummy fell down and is asleep" - I freaked out and called the ambulance, as I live 25 miles away from her and don't drive. She was sent home despite the haemorrhage - they said there was nothing wrong with her and that she was just a whiner :mad:.

She was admitted to a hospital 20 miles away, out of desperation, and they told her that the placenta was dead, she had blood poisoning and that if they did not perform a caesearian immediately, she and the baby would be dead. They had to send her medical records back to the local hospital - which the local hospital promptly falsified, so that they could not be sued for negligence. Worthless little fuckers. :madspit: They wrote a letter to my sister's specialist doctor (who is treating her for free, because he is disgusted at the way she has been treated - if it wasn't for his help, we'd be seriously fucked) saying that she was a morphine addict and loads of other bullshit - and they took 5 months to come up with that one.

Just to add insult to injury - she had a mild heart attack a few months back, at the grand old age of 21. The specialist she is now seeing - who is actually a cardiologist -
says that it was the untreated haemorrhage that damaged her heart in the first place. She was actually going to be put forward for open heart surgery - then they discovered the cancer.

I know this all sounds unbelievable - I'm permanently praying that this will all end up to be some long and hideous nightmare; unfortunately, that doesn't seem to be the case.

I have no faith in the so-called Healthcare system ,in this pathetic little island that I had the misfortune to be born and spend most of my life in so far. Fuck Britain to hell and back.

Sorry about the swearing and ranting - I just needed to let off steam - I have no idea how to deal with being told that my little sister is going to die from this shit. It hasn't sunk in yet because I've only had an hour of sleep in the last 36 hours, worked all day, and my brain is just refusing to accept anything.

We'll find out on the 23rd if there is any available treatment... I just keep wondering what the hell my family and I ever did to deserve this - not to mention my nieces who are 2 and a half, and 9 months respectively.
:sad::sad:
 
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Oh no! I'm so sorry. Can she get some type of second opinion or something? It's horrible to have to wonder if what you are being told is really true or if someone just doesn't care.

I honestly don't know what to say...I'd be so completely overwhelmed. Just know that many of us care about you and your sister (and rest of the family too). And ranting is fine...we all need to do it sometimes.
 
omg Sara, please rant all you want. You have very good reason. I can't begin to imagine how frustrated and angry your family is right now.

And please don't think you or your family ever did anything to deserve this...the state of the health care system in the UK is certainly not your fault.

Please let us know what you find out on the 23rd. :hug: :hug: :hug:
 
rileybug said:
I'll reserve a spare prayer for your sister. I'm having a bit of a health crisis with an immediate family member right now as well... it's so hard when you can't really do anything. I do want to mention that even if she cannot have chemo, that she should not give up. There are alternatives to conventional medicine that I have seen work when conventional medicine has failed. I had a sister with a very bad form of cancer and it had already spread. She had a 3% chance of survival, her doctor told her to go home and get her affairs in order, he said she had 5 months tops. This was 1988. She is still here, alive and well. My mother had Rheumatoid Arthritis very bad, she could not walk, she was completely incapacitated for a year. She went to 2 conventional doctors and both gave her medication that did not help, just made it worse. She took matters into her own hands using alternative medicine/natural healing methods and has gone to 3 U2 concerts since, travels extensively, gardens and has 95% health back. I know it looks bleak for your sister, especially if she can't have chemo, but there ARE alternatives to chemo and there is ALWAYS hope, especially if the patient is willing to FIGHT.
Click to expand...

Thankyou so much for that - I have read this post to my Mum, and told my sis about it too. Thankyou rileybug
 
:hug:

Is your sister well enough to travel to somewhere where she can get into a clinical phase testing centre? The treatment she's getting from her primary physicians sounds horribly inadequate and I hope for all of you that they at least did discuss with you the options of trying out new candidate drugs (if at all possible at this stage).

It is heartbreaking news. I will keep you in my thoughts.
 
I appreciate that anitram - thanks for your kind words.

The thing that scares me the most is, when my sister began having heart problems because of the haemorrhage, she was put on steriods. The local hospital hadn't detected any sort of illness, let alonethe cancer (regardless of the fact that tumours were growing on Leila's major organs at this point).

Guess what? The steroids made the tumours bigger. What are we supposed to do when so-called "professionals" are sickeningly uncaring and negligent?

We put in an offiicial complaint after my sister and her baby nearly died. So what did the hospital do? Falsified her records. They literally threw her out of the ward and told her not to come back. Why? Because, when a consultant told her there was nothing wrong with her or the baby, she told him to get lost, and that she had a 2 year old daughter at home, and needed his help then and there to at least try and find out why she was passing out and unable to walk.

If anyone lives in Harlow, Essex, England: DO NOT GO TO THE PRINCESS ALEXANDRA HOSPITAL. They don't give a flying fuck whether you live or die.

I needed to let all that out! Thanks to all of you for being kind.
 
Steroids are immunosuppressants. They are used in order to shut down your immune system's temporary overreaction, but they also leave you immunocompromised and unable to cope with infections and so on.

You have a right to be angry, and it's just a testament to how much you love your sister that you've shared this story and your feelings with us. I'm sure she's honoured to have you in her life.
 
Sally, my thoughts are with you and your family.

It is good to see that both of you are not prepared to lie down and be trampled over. Keep strong and look after yourself as well.

:hug:
 
Hi again,

My sister was told on the telephone today, that she has leukaemia in her bone marrow and throat as well as cancer of the kidney, which then spread to her liver and lung.

She has been given 5 months to live.

If it wasn't for the fact that my 2 little nieces and mum would be left alone, I would give up completely.

I'm so frightened and my poor mum is devastated. My poor sister... what the hell are we going to tell Lucy (she's 2 and a half now). Luckily Emily is too young to know anything about it.

Fucking hell. Pardon the swearing.
 
:hug: :hug: :hug:

You are a good sister.

And never let yourself be beholden to the timeframe of a doctor. I know it's tempting to "know" the number of your days, but it's also a bit like chasing rainbows. So I will continue to pray for a better solution for your family.
 
Cinnamon:hug:
Your whole family will certianly be in my prayers for a while. Sometimes it's things like this that really make us re-evaluate our own lives. It's times when we think we have no luck in the world, that we have to think about things like this. Sometimes a little perspective can do wonders for one's soul.


Sorry, I don't want that to come across the wrong way. Just a little self-reflection:sad: While I really hope things will turn around for your sister, and your whole family as well, just hope that if things follow their current path, she will no doubt be in a better place. I admire your will to stay strong, as I'm sure that your sister would want you to.

Oh my, I've got myself too worked up now...I better just leave you with this...

"My body is bent and broken by long and dangerous sleep
I can't work the fields of Abraham and turn my head away
I'm not a stranger in the hands of the Maker"


Your friend,
~Lance.:hug:
 
Just spoke to my sister who came home from having a scan done. They've found another fucking lump - in her neck, it's part of the leukaemia, though, not the cancer (I don't understand any of it but there you go). They said the oncology department will call her next week and in the meanwhile, if she wants a morphine drip, she needs to tell them and they will send one. They're still saying there's nothing they can do. :huh:

Oh my God, I can't believe this is happening. I'm waiting to wake up and find that this was all bullshit.

It hasn't hit me fully yet - I broke at 4 this morning, and again just now, and howled for a while. I manage to push it aside for a few minutes if I'm lucky, but then it all comes back and jumps up and down on my head with hobnailed boots.

Leila's the baby of the family - I have 2 brothers that are 11 and 12 years older than me, whereas there is only 4 and a half
years between me and my sister. I was so mean to her when we were kids. Following the pattern of what my dad did to my brother - he used to beat the shit out of him - my brother used to hit me sometimes, and I would sometimes do the same to my sister. I've talked to her about it many times over the past few years and she understood, because that's the sort of kindhearted and caring person she is.

:sad: I took an overdose a long time ago, when I was 16, and it was my sister who came home from school and found me unconscious - she found me and thought I was dead, she ran screaming and howling down the road to her friend's house whose mum called an ambulance and got me to hospital. She was 11 years old. I can't forgive myself for any of this shit - and I know it's pointless and it won't help my family if I end up having a nervous breakdown because of things I can't change now.

I really need to stop being so selfish because my sister is (according to what the consultant said yesterday) going to die slowly and in a great deal of pain... she refuses to take morphine for the pain and she's coughing up blood. I need to be strong enough to help her as best I can. I need to be strong for my mum as well because my Gran is expected to die around the same time - she has cancer too.

My poor, poor little niece Lucy - I spoke to her on the phone yesterday, she was at home with her baby sis and my mum. My sister had to go out briefly. Lucy kept saying down the phone to me "Where's Mummy? Mummy will be back in the minute, won't she?" (She doesn't understand that you say 'a minute', not 'the minute'.) How the hell are we supposed to tell her that Mummy won't be coming back at all? IF my sister does go in 5 months time as the "experts" predicted, Lucy will be 3, and she'll have to watch the whole thing with us. Thank God Emily is too young to know what's going on. Lucy's been having nightmares for months - she wakes up at night screaming "mummy, where's mummy". I felt uneasy when that kept happening because Lucy is really perceptive, and has one of the closest bonds with my sister that I've ever seen between a mother and her child.

I'm sorry for blabbing on and on about the same thing, I know other people have got horrible problems too. Also sorry if I keep repeating myself - I think this is just a way of trying to let some of the hurt out.. I can't think straight so I don't know.

I am praying for a miracle... I don't know what the hell else I can do apart from be there and be as supportive as is humanly possible..javascript:checklength(document.vbform);
[check message length]
 
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