mad1
ONE love, blood, life
Oh dear.....hi.......
Look guys, I know I havent been on here for ages, so it must be cheeky that I just turn up, but I need to let go.....basically.
For a few weeks now I have NOT been a good Administrator, what with arriving a bit late each mornin and being a bit abrupt with pple on the phone......and esp prehaps listening for the answer Im waiting for and immediately cutting pple off mid-conversation - suddenly realising what I've done and immediately apologising. I think 'why did I just do that? That was wrong!'........
Also I've become lazier in work, with not bothering on keeping on top of things.
I put this down to a number of things but two that stand out could be
A: Im really bored Im not stimulated enough at work, therefore end up finding it a pain to get up and go too knowing what the day is like, believe me, if i was under pressure, I dont think I would be how I am right now!
B: Yea, after the few posts I put down in past, Im still unhappy with me, and cannot motivate myself to go do something outside work. Thus Im now blending the 'unhappy-me-outside-work' into work now which is making me bitter and act the way I do........Ive been lazier getting up in the mornings too.........
Anyway my boss took me aside today and mentioned these to me, and I feel embarrassed that perhaps all Management discussed this and I look like a pr*ck now...........I mean, to feel that I, myself, mighta made myself a topic of conversation for a moment........gawd, its sooooo embarrassing. Its all my fault of course, and it should never have come to this, and sometimes I think Im being laughed at when trying to correct it,etc..........or gossip is 'shes no good anymore, na na - she got told off!'
Oh dear.....please someone else tell me Im bad.....I feel bad.......Ive done this before.........but this company Im in.....have been very reasonable.
I mean, my boss's boss, which would be my main boss, asked her to talk to me instead, because he genuingly didnt want to feel he was upsetting me............of course of course I would rather be picked up by the scruff of the neck and told off, kick in the backside, to re-start again, but Im surprised......I mean, maybe Im no good anymore.................they should replace me.....
And where the hell did all my manners go.............
I've really let myself and the company down......havent I.
Im sorry pple, I just had no-one else to turn and let this out too.
I must pull myself together. Why do I keep thinking its more embarrassing to be making an effort.......what f*king head have I got!
*
at herelf*
and u all should go too!
Look guys, I know I havent been on here for ages, so it must be cheeky that I just turn up, but I need to let go.....basically.For a few weeks now I have NOT been a good Administrator, what with arriving a bit late each mornin and being a bit abrupt with pple on the phone......and esp prehaps listening for the answer Im waiting for and immediately cutting pple off mid-conversation - suddenly realising what I've done and immediately apologising. I think 'why did I just do that? That was wrong!'........
Also I've become lazier in work, with not bothering on keeping on top of things.
I put this down to a number of things but two that stand out could be
A: Im really bored Im not stimulated enough at work, therefore end up finding it a pain to get up and go too knowing what the day is like, believe me, if i was under pressure, I dont think I would be how I am right now!
B: Yea, after the few posts I put down in past, Im still unhappy with me, and cannot motivate myself to go do something outside work. Thus Im now blending the 'unhappy-me-outside-work' into work now which is making me bitter and act the way I do........Ive been lazier getting up in the mornings too.........
Anyway my boss took me aside today and mentioned these to me, and I feel embarrassed that perhaps all Management discussed this and I look like a pr*ck now...........I mean, to feel that I, myself, mighta made myself a topic of conversation for a moment........gawd, its sooooo embarrassing. Its all my fault of course, and it should never have come to this, and sometimes I think Im being laughed at when trying to correct it,etc..........or gossip is 'shes no good anymore, na na - she got told off!'
Oh dear.....please someone else tell me Im bad.....I feel bad.......Ive done this before.........but this company Im in.....have been very reasonable.
I mean, my boss's boss, which would be my main boss, asked her to talk to me instead, because he genuingly didnt want to feel he was upsetting me............of course of course I would rather be picked up by the scruff of the neck and told off, kick in the backside, to re-start again, but Im surprised......I mean, maybe Im no good anymore.................they should replace me.....
And where the hell did all my manners go.............
I've really let myself and the company down......havent I.
Im sorry pple, I just had no-one else to turn and let this out too.
I must pull myself together. Why do I keep thinking its more embarrassing to be making an effort.......what f*king head have I got!
*
at herelf*and u all should go
too! 
to all of this. 
I wake up all week mornings thinking 'here I go again' 
I get tired easily, I am lazier than before, I've got no motivation because I see there's no more challenge for me here. And what do I get: Frustation. Because this is the only job that gives me a decent salary I can't quit. So don't feel you're a bad person for changing your attitude towards your job. Perhaps now you don't feel challenged enough or it just plain bores you. talk to your manager about changing to another position. Maybe a change will help improve the way you feel.
