my grandfather is mad

[the rockin edge]

my grandfather is insane.

He is an old-fashioned higly religious person, frequently anoying but now he's gone to another level

he owns a piece of property with a small house on it adjacent to our house, he has been renting out this property to someone for several years now, he decided he wants to sell the property to this guy (for less than 1/2 of the market value).

this guy he's selling to has a history of money problems (bankrupcy etc) so he found it very hard to get a loan to buy the property (they have been trying to get this done for 2 years now) he finally got a loan from somewhere, and today my the deal was completed. my grandfather got his money

so now he will give it all away, to missionarys etc. all of it will be gone in a matter of months. i overheard him talking to someone just now and he said "it's so wonderful, i 've been in my room this afternoon writing checks! 2k for this , 2k for that" etc.

he is 87, has had heart problems and currently lives with us. my mother (his daughter) & his other children have tried on numerous occasions to get him to save money in case he needs further care in the future with no success. Now he has a large sum of money that he could very easily save for this but no, he will give it all away. is and he does all this for God!

the thing that makes me mad the most is that he cares more about giving money away than his own family. (we finlly convinced him to go to Arizona to see his greatgrandchildren for the first time, he's going next week.) that trip was paid for by his son's family who don't have much extra money and now he has all this money, he hasn't said one thing about paying them for even part of the trip or anything about going to see his other son who lives in Montana etc.



so now i sit here vowing never to get my priorities this screwed up and wishing there was some way to stop him from getting rid of the money, even though i know there isn't

 

[MirrorballLemon]

yea, quit trying to be The Brush. you ain't as cool as him, so dont even try.

 

[the rockin edge]

 

[WildHoneyAlways]

yea, quit trying to be The Brush. you ain't as cool as him, so dont even try.

 

[TheBrush]

my grandfather is insane.

He is an old-fashioned higly religious person, frequently anoying but now he's gone to another level

he owns a piece of property with a small house on it adjacent to our house, he has been renting out this property to someone for several years now, he decided he wants to sell the property to this guy (for less than 1/2 of the market value).

this guy he's selling to has a history of money problems (bankrupcy etc) so he found it very hard to get a loan to buy the property (they have been trying to get this done for 2 years now) he finally got a loan from somewhere, and today my the deal was completed. my grandfather got his money

so now he will give it all away, to missionarys etc. all of it will be gone in a matter of months. i overheard him talking to someone just now and he said "it's so wonderful, i 've been in my room this afternoon writing checks! 2k for this , 2k for that" etc.

he is 87, has had heart problems and currently lives with us. my mother (his daughter) & his other children have tried on numerous occasions to get him to save money in case he needs further care in the future with no success. Now he has a large sum of money that he could very easily save for this but no, he will give it all away. is and he does all this for God!

the thing that makes me mad the most is that he cares more about giving money away than his own family. (we finlly convinced him to go to Arizona to see his greatgrandchildren for the first time, he's going next week.) that trip was paid for by his son's family who don't have much extra money and now he has all this money, he hasn't said one thing about paying them for even part of the trip or anything about going to see his other son who lives in Montana etc.



so now i sit here vowing never to get my priorities this screwed up and wishing there was some way to stop him from getting rid of the money, even though i know there isn't

Old people are strange......thus meaning we will all be strange one day too.
I feel for you. Sadly it is very hard to change older peoples minds because of how set in thier ways they are.
And to but he spending all of your inheiritance right? kidding!!!!!

 

[U2Girl1978]

yea, quit trying to be The Brush. you ain't as cool as him, so dont even try.

Was that really necessary???? Way to be supportive!


Tre, I'm sorry that you are going through this.

 

[TheBrush]

Was that really necessary???? Way to be supportive!


Tre, I'm sorry that you are going through this.

Mirrorballemon was being supportive.....of me. Im insecure and need my groupies.

 

[the rockin edge]

Tre, I'm sorry that you are going through this.

thanks

Old people are strange......thus meaning we will all be strange one day too.
I feel for you. Sadly it is very hard to change older peoples minds because of how set in thier ways they are.
And to but he spending all of your inheiritance right? kidding!!!!!

true, he sure is set in is ways

nah, it wouldn't be my inheiritance. it would be my mother & her brothers

 

[indra]

my grandfather is insane.

He is an old-fashioned higly religious person, frequently anoying but now he's gone to another level

he owns a piece of property with a small house on it adjacent to our house, he has been renting out this property to someone for several years now, he decided he wants to sell the property to this guy (for less than 1/2 of the market value).

this guy he's selling to has a history of money problems (bankrupcy etc) so he found it very hard to get a loan to buy the property (they have been trying to get this done for 2 years now) he finally got a loan from somewhere, and today my the deal was completed. my grandfather got his money

so now he will give it all away, to missionarys etc. all of it will be gone in a matter of months. i overheard him talking to someone just now and he said "it's so wonderful, i 've been in my room this afternoon writing checks! 2k for this , 2k for that" etc.

he is 87, has had heart problems and currently lives with us. my mother (his daughter) & his other children have tried on numerous occasions to get him to save money in case he needs further care in the future with no success. Now he has a large sum of money that he could very easily save for this but no, he will give it all away. is and he does all this for God!

the thing that makes me mad the most is that he cares more about giving money away than his own family. (we finlly convinced him to go to Arizona to see his greatgrandchildren for the first time, he's going next week.) that trip was paid for by his son's family who don't have much extra money and now he has all this money, he hasn't said one thing about paying them for even part of the trip or anything about going to see his other son who lives in Montana etc.



so now i sit here vowing never to get my priorities this screwed up and wishing there was some way to stop him from getting rid of the money, even though i know there isn't

You know it is entirely possible that he is not competent enough to be handling his money. You say he's "taken it to another level" and describe some very odd behaviour. It might be possible to have him declared legally incompetent and have someone else (often another family member, but that person would have to be appointed by the courts I believe) handle his money and make various financial decisions for him.

It can get ugly and is often painful for those involved, but it can also save a lot of pain since elderly people are often taken advantage of by unscrupolous people.

Good luck and

 

[the rockin edge]

Re: Re: my grandfather is mad

You know it is entirely possible that he is not competent enough to be handling his money. You say he's "taken it to another level" and describe some very odd behaviour. It might be possible to have him declared legally incompetent and have someone else (often another family member, but that person would have to be appointed by the courts I believe) handle his money and make various financial decisions for him.

It can get ugly and is often painful for those involved, but it can also save a lot of pain since elderly people are often taken advantage of by unscrupolous people.

Good luck and

thanks

this has been discussed in great detail, yes it has to be done by a court and he wouldn't be passed legally incompetent at this point.

 

[Numb1075]

Mirrorballemon was being supportive.....of me. Im insecure and need my groupies.

can i be the president of TheBrush Groupies Fan Club?


sorry for hijacked thread...I hope things work out the best for you and your family.

 

[MirrorballLemon]

I'm the president. you can be the VP.

All hail The Brush

 

[Numb1075]

I'm the president. you can be the VP.

All hail The Brush

I know him longer

 

[TheBrush]

I know him longer

I got myself a crew

 

[MirrorballLemon]

I know him longer

i dont fucking care if you know him longer. i was the one who got his back when this thread started. what were you doing??? oh thats right, jacking off to that topless picture of Bono in your avatar....

and lets use proper grammar...."ive known him longer"

 

[Sicy]

Dude you want to chill out? Your posts in this thread have been extremely rude to say the least.

 

[redkat]

tre that does suck


taking him to court is the only thing you could really do and it looks like it's too late for that. I don't know how easy it is to prove someone incompetent either. Your mom would probably become his guardian.

 

[the rockin edge]

tre that does suck


taking him to court is the only thing you could really do and it looks like it's too late for that. I don't know how easy it is to prove someone incompetent either. Your mom would probably become his guardian.

there's some semi good news today...he put half the money into certificates of deposit at the bank albeit short term ones.

my mom said to me tonight that when the CoDs mature (around a year) he may be legal incompetent,(who knows!) so we may be able to stop him getting rid of the remainder at that time.

 

[TheBrush]

there's some semi good news today...he put half the money into certificates of deposit at the bank albeit short term ones.

my mom said to me tonight that when the CoDs mature (around a year) he may be legal incompetent,(who knows!) so we may be able to stop him getting rid of the remainder at that time.

Thats a step in the right direction, glad to hear it.

 

[Muggsy]

my grandma hides things and then she says that we stoled them

and no... she's not getting senile.. is just that she doesn't like us to visit her and she is bitter

 

[the rockin edge]

some more weirdness

now he said to my mom tonight, that he had the CoDs worked out so that if he dies before they mature they wouldn't go into the will but go strait to my mom, so it was "her money now" so she said but that's only if you die before they mature (11 months) and as long as he was alive the money would still be his and he shruged and acted like that wasn't gonna be an option

so i guess he thinks he will die soon for whatever reason

this statement is totally unlike him, just weird

 

[VintagePunk]

I think older people become aware of, and to a certain degree, accepting of their mortality, and have a need to let their loved ones know what's going on with their finances or possessions.

For years now, if my mom has any extra cash at all in her house for whatever reason, even just $50, she makes a point to tell me where it is, "just in case." That's probably all your grandfather is doing.

 

[the rockin edge]

yeah, that does make sense. it's just totally unlike him

 

[the rockin edge]

he was acting the strangest i've ever seen him today, my mom said she thinks it's partly because he's going to arizona for a week tomorrow and she also is wondering if he reckons he will die before he gets back or something like that. like he is feeling worse with heart trouble without telling anyone

i've always wondered what i would feel like when he dies, i'm still not sure

 

[Carek1230]

death = sadness

 

[the rockin edge]

well that's what i'd normally think but I don't see myself feeling all that sad if he dies, i mean we're not close in any way.

usually if someones dies you tell the family you're sorry for their loss, so if someone were to say that to me i think i'd find myself thinking something like 'what real loss?' none of us really get on with him & his children all have very bad memories of him especially while they were growing up.

he's caused this family plenty of aggrevation, still does & when he dies i don't really see it effecting us.

that sounds like an awful thing to say but i think it's true.

 

[VintagePunk]

There's nothing wrong with that, you're just more honest with yourself than many people are. Often, if you don't feel sadness because of a real sense of loss yourself, then you'll feel it due to empathy for those who are hurt by the loss. Or, you might feel very little. ALL very normal reactions.

 

[the rockin edge]

thanks VP that does make sense