My Father died

[Carek1230]

13 years ago today. It's weird, isn't it how the pain and the void seems to dissipate as the years pass, but that we don't forget. Every year for several days in August I am in a strange frame of mind, contemplative really. I think about what several of the dates held as far as memories. Yesterday I was talking to my mom and she mentioned that it had been 13 years and where did the time go since my dad died. I then realized I didn't feel as sad as I normally have. I woke up this morning feeling that dismal sad empty feeling though and it's been with me all day. I am pampering myself today, and letting the memories flow through my heart and my mind. No tears but I think I am feeling better. I've just been thinking how weird it is how these things happen to us on anniversaries of days we lost loved ones.

 

[vaz02]

Days like these i go for a long walk alone, i have a river near me which i walk down when i wanna be alone.

Im lucky enough to still have both parents around, i dont say it much to them but i love em.

 

[Thora]

for you Carek. Both of my parents are still alive, but as you know, I've lost several people close to me this year. This year was also the 10th anniversary of my grandfather's death. I definitely experienced similar emotions on that day.

Glad to hear that you're taking care of yourself today.

 

[anitram]

It sounds like you have a lot of wonderful memories and I'm glad you took the day for yourself, to spend it the way you needed to.

 

[BonosBaby12]

Im happy that today wasn't too bad for you. You will always have the memories and remembering them such as you are is very comforting

 

[JCOSTER]

I can totally relate especially when my loved ones have passed on days like Thanksgiving, St. Pats, Halloween, Christmas Eve,
Easter...

 

[BluRmGrl]

Carek I didn't realize you lost your father in August as well. The 29th will be one year for me . It still catches me off guard sometimes & I have to take a minute to compose myself. I'm hoping once we get through all the "firsts" (1st month w/out him; 1st holiday w/out him; 1st birthday, anniversary, etc.) that will stop happening so often since it's really awkward for me to have to keep explaining to people why I'm upset. (I know it's perfectly normal to still grieve, but I'm just not comfortable being emotional around co-workers, friends, etc. And since I can't live in a cave the rest of my life.... ) Anyway, this thread isn't about me & I don't want to derail it.

Carke, I send you my heartfelt sympathy - time heals the hurt, but it can't make your loss any less.

 

[Carek1230]

Thank you all, your words, caring, kindness means a lot. And BluRmGrl I hope the years make things easier for you as they have for me. The first year IS the hardest. I will be thinking about you on the 29th, sending hugs prayers and positive thoughts to you and to your family. Just seize the day and go with the emotion. That's what has helped me along with doing something pampering or quiet and reflective like sitting on the beach

to all!

 

[JanuaryStar]

We never forget, Carek... That's the funny thing about it. You seem to think differently about these things over the years, but we never forget.

 

[Carek1230]

you are so right.

 

[preciousstone]

Wow, Carek you and I have something in common.

My dad died May 17, 22 years ago. I feel really reflective and somewhat "down" during that time, only because I feel like I should be remembering him.

 

[preciousstone]

That didn't come out right. I meant, I feel like I should be remembering him every day and the fact that I don't...well I kind of beat myself up over it, especially on the anniversary of his death.
I miss my dad, every day, even without realizing it.

 

[mecricksavard]

So sorry for your loss. I can relate, having lost both parents - my mother in 1975 and my father in 2001. Time does heal, but until you have gone through it, you can't imagine how losing them impacts the rest of your life.
Keep the memories near and dear to you. And a note to all who still have their parents around - make sure you tell them how much they mean to you.
Take good care of you!

 

[preciousstone]

Take good care of you too!

 

[greeneyedgirl]

 

[Lila64]

 

[U2 Bliss]

Carek – thanks for sharing your thoughts/feelings with us – I can so relate to how you are feeling today.

I lost my Dad 12 years in September and still have those 'bad' days.

Hang in there – today is today – tomorrow is a new day.

Keeping your Dad alive in your heart will always make him be with you – no matter what. So keep the memories flowing.

 

[TranceEnding]

 

[nbcrusader]

 

[Carek1230]

Thank you one and all, I managed to get through this day. I am really thankful that I do have good memories. to all!

 

[neutral]

That didn't come out right. I meant, I feel like I should be remembering him every day and the fact that I don't...well I kind of beat myself up over it, especially on the anniversary of his death.
I miss my dad, every day, even without realizing it.

Please try not to beat yourself up, I know what you mean but I think there's no right or wrong way to grieve.


to Carek and everyone. Blah... I miss my dad so much.

 

[tiny dancer]

Carek I know what you are going through and how it feels. Both of my parent have passed on. It's been 7 years in February that my dad paseed away, and it will be 3 years on August 30th that I lost my mom. Last year I didn't do too bad with my mom being gone, but some how I think that this year I will feel it even more, and find it hard to deal with.
Don't ask me why, I just can't answer the reason.

A bunch of hug sfor you Carek.

And for RluBmGrl a bunch for you also.

 

[BluRmGrl]

I didn't realize so many of belong to the same crappy club...

GROUP HUG!!!

 

[Carek1230]

Thanks, TD, Neural and BluRmGrl! I think I am much better today.

 

[YBORCITY]