Looking for some advice...

[onebloodonelife]

So there's this guy I like in my high school, he's a senior and I'm a junior and we're in Global Geography together. I'm really bad at reading signals, so that's why I'm asking for some help interpreting them here. We talk quite a bit in class, usually about things going on in the class, but sometimes about his future(he wants to go to college, then into the military to serve in Iraq) I always catch him looking at me during class and he either smiles or looks away really quickly. So, I guess what I'm asking is whether I should pursue this or not and if I should, how to go about it?

 

[menelaos]

Don't think about it...If he's looking away very quickly that means he's staring you before you looked him...So don't hesitate...
I don't know about the other guys here but it's nice when a girl pursues the boy and not the opposite...
At least I like this...

 

[Liesje]

I would be hesistant to put a lot of effort into beginning a relationship with a guy that's going off to college in less than a year and already has plans to join the military, unless you're more looking to hook up and won't get emotionally attached (which is difficult to control).

 

[youtooellen]

^ agreed

personally, I would try to make a stronger friendship before pursuing a relationship..

maybe you could talk to him more, get to know him to a point where you can be sure that he likes you and feels the same as you do towards pursuing a relationship.

 

[onebloodonelife]

Thanks so much for the advice! I'm definitely going to make an effort to get to know him better before going after anything. If anyone else has advice, I'd be happy to hear it as well!

 

[For Honor]

........ what do you want from this person?


That's really what you need to figure out first. What do you want from him, and what do you want from a "relationship" or do you wnat a relationship?

 

[UberBeaver]

If he's looking, that's good. Talk to him. If he's shy, talk to him some more until he gets comfortable.

I don't see why you can't get to know him on dates, I've never understood the whole "I need to get to know someone before I go on a date with them" thing. I thought the purpose of dating was to get to know someone.

Screw it, just go for it. Young love rules!

 

[onebloodonelife]

........ what do you want from this person?


That's really what you need to figure out first. What do you want from him, and what do you want from a "relationship" or do you wnat a relationship?

I know that I do want a relationship for sure, I'd like it to be a long term deal, but of course, I can't control that...

 

[SummerLily]

Just take it one day at a time. Don't rush.

If you're hesitant because it's his desire to join the military and serve in Iraq, if I were in your shoes I'd be scared too. However, I have a cousin who married a military man and they are quite happy with their life. They've enjoyed living in different countries, as well as the excellent benefits the military has provided them.

If you're hesitant about making the first move, I thought you might find this interesting: I read on AOL that 96% of men said they love it when the woman makes the first move.


Best of luck to you!

 

[For Honor]

In all reality, it depends on how much it means to you.

If you really want something a lot, and you see it as a worthy cause in your eyes, then it doesn't matter what you go through, or even if you get it or not. Is this an oppertunity that you can afford to pass up?


If it is, then I would stop concerning yourself with it.
If it's sometime you can't live with out, then pursue it.

I can't really say if "you" should go out with him or not. The only thing I'd really stress is that if you are looking for long term, be upfront about it and state your expecttions, so that even if he doesn't agree or is unsure, he knows where YOU stand. If it scares him off, then so be it.

I'd warn against him using you. I mean..... there are a lot of 18 year old guys who'd do anything to get a junior girl to go out with them, or get sex out of, etc, etc, and i'm sure you know guys can be great liars when they want something. So just be careful.

There are a lot of senior guys who do want quality, long term relationships, too. So don't let that scare you out of it. Just be cautious

 

[For Honor]

^ especially if you are inexperienced or in an odd social position, I would exercise caution. But I don't know anything about that, from what you've said thus far.

 

[Liesje]

I know that I do want a relationship for sure, I'd like it to be a long term deal, but of course, I can't control that...

Trust me, find a new piece of eye-candy and stick to associating w/ this guy as a lab partner. You do NOT want to intentionally get hooked on this guy knowing you WILL have to have a long term relationship...and not only a long term relationship, but one where he is in college and you're still in high school. Let it go, you'll save yourself a lot of misery in the end.