I'm off my meds...again

[love2bmama]

I can't believe it, after going through total hell running out of my antidepressants just a few months ago, I'm out again.

We just moved and it took me a lot longer to get my new insurance set up and find a prescriber than I thought it would. I tried to plan ahead and I've been working on this for *weeks*, literally, but I still couldn't get it taken care of before I ran out.

The side effects of going off this med are horrible, and now I'm in withdrawal which doesn't help when it comes to figuring out how to get some help.

I seriously don't know how many times I can keep on doing this. Being able to function and carry on a normal life hinges on taking these little purple-ish pills twice a day. What kind of a life is that?

 

[indra]

Can't you buy them and just pay for them? I know they aren't cheap as I haven't had insurance for over 10 years so I'm very aware of the costs of perscriptions, but it seem the cost of not taking them is more.

** edit -- I just noticed you mentioned not being able to find a prescriber. Is it that you can't find one covered by your insurance or can't find one at all?

 

[U2Man]

i've always wondered...how much do these antidepressants actually help, especially compared to the side-effects ?

 

[Liesje]

How terrible! If you can, I'd do what indra says and just buy them straight up. I did this for six months when I had no insurance, but *needed* my meds to function (not for depression, but constant migraines related to hormones). You can probably see if the insurance can reimburse you later on, but if not, it will be better for your physical and mental health to stay on them.

 

[love2bmama]

I'm not going to do a really good job of describing the situation right now, but I'll try.

I don't have a prescriber here, I got a couple of waiting lists a month or so ago, but it will be a few more weeks before I can get a prescription. There are not a lot of options for the uninsured, short of paying up front but I was told the office visit was going to be $200. I just couldn't afford that, with 4 kids and it being right after christmas.

Even if I had a precription, it costs $379 for a months supply of my med. Again, no way I can afford it. It would absolutely be worth it, but I just lost my job (it was seasonal) and...you know, there are always a hundred "ands". I just can't afford it.

At this point, my insurance should be set up early next week. I just don't know how to hold on until then. I've been on this med for almost 7 years, and this is the 2nd time I've gone through withdrawals. It is sheer hell, I don't know what it's like with other meds but the one I'm on, it is really really bad.

u2man, that's a good question. I know that before I started taking meds, I was suicidal and hospitalized numerous times, and if I hadn't started taking something I would probably have eventually gotten serious about suicide and succeeded. When I'm on my meds, life is good. Not great, but good. There are side effects, like weight gain and loss of libido, but the real killer is the withdrawals. I'm kind of faced with taking this for the foreseeable future, or being very ill. I'm not sure it's the kind of life I want, but it's the life I have.

 

[anitram]

Where do you live?

In some places, pharmacists have discretion as to whether or not to charge you for the cost of your prescriptions. Most people don't know this, but there are jurisdictions where they can elect to give you medication if they feel there is a need and you cannot afford it.

 

[Got Philk?]

Oh! You can try this. I didn't have insurance OR money to get my medication(for seizures). So I went strait to my doctor and said, look, if you want me to be on these, I need help! He gave me a form to fill out, and poof, a week or 2 later at the most, I had 3 months worth of pills!

Is this a possibility? Hang in there!

 

[bonosloveslave]

Have you asked your old doctor if they might be able to help? When I didn't have insurance for a stretch, my doctor was able to help me out by giving me samples of the medication, he'd load me up with 2-3 months worth at a time. Many phamaceutical companies for most types of medications provide drug samples that the doctors can give out for free. It's worth a phone call, good luck

 

[Alisaura]

Molly, please hang in there. Hopefully you can work something out with your doctor or a pharmacist... I don't know much about the health care systems in other countries.

 

[love2bmama]

You guys have lots of great advice! I think I will be able to get a prescription and get it filled early next week, as soon as my insurance goes through.

In the meantime, I've tried some of your ideas and the only thing I think I can do is to go to a walk-in clinic or ER and try to be seen by a doctor that way, and hopefully they can give me a few days worth of meds to hold me over.

I did go to one of the urgent care clinics today, but after waiting 2 hours I was told it would be 3-4 hours more and I just couldn't handle waiting any more. I think maybe I'll go back early tomorrow morning when it might not be very busy.

I guess I'm doing ok but I'm just not feeling very strong. I need to know I'm not alone. It's hard for me to get the support I need from my family, I'm the mom and the wife and I'm supposed to have it all together. I pretty much keep this family running, keep the house going, take care of everyone. I guess that's why I'm posting here about this, because I just need some support from someone out there that isn't going to be worried about how this will affect *them*. Make sense?

 

[Liesje]

I guess I'm doing ok but I'm just not feeling very strong. I need to know I'm not alone. It's hard for me to get the support I need from my family, I'm the mom and the wife and I'm supposed to have it all together. I pretty much keep this family running, keep the house going, take care of everyone. I guess that's why I'm posting here about this, because I just need some support from someone out there that isn't going to be worried about how this will affect *them*. Make sense?

You're not alone. I don't have depression, but I have other health problems and financial problems in the past and have had my share of crying because of insurance companies and other financial institutions seem to care only for fucking us over, kicking us repeatedly while we're already down.

I'm the type of person who is usually in control of every situation and any possible backup plans, so when something goes wrong and I know I've done everything in my power to make it right but I'm still getting screwed, I fall apart inside.

It sounds like you've done as much as anyone could expect and like most of middle class America, nobody else cares unless we have a LOT of money or a pretty insurance card (necessitating a lot of money). I really hope your doctor can work something out temporarily. If doctors aren't looking out for us and going the extra mile, this country really is totally fucked.

You may not feel strong, but I think you are really strong for being able to face these issues, share them with others, and be the support for your family.

 

[verte76]

I'm an autistic and going off my meds is my worst nightmare. Hang in there, I know it's got to be tough.

 

[love2bmama]

Thanks again, you guys. I did go back to urgent care last night, it took over 3 hours but I left with a prescription in hand. Luckily, there is a 24 hour pharmacy in town, and my hubby was nice enough to drive there at 11 last night.

Of course, we couldn't afford to fill the whole prescription, but we had enough cash to buy 4 pills which will last me 2 days. Hopefully on Monday I can talk to my insurance company and get them to authorize the rest of the prescription, even though I don't have my card yet.

So, I'm doing better. Not feeling as sick, and a little less hopeless. The state of healthcare in the US is a disgrace, really. There are millions of people who make too much to qualify for state-sponsored medical care but too little to afford health insurance, if they are even lucky enough to have an employer that offers it.

As I was leaving the clinic last night, the nurse that discharged me read the form that goes along with a discharge after a diagnonis of depression. Here are the 3 pieces of advice they gave:

1. If you're feeling sad, spend time with family/friends
2. Don't take someone else's meds
3. Don't lose hope

I literally, audibly snorted at that last. I mean, really. As if being told that is actually going to help anyone. "Oh! don't lose HOPE! Duh, why didn't I think of that before!"

 

[ntalwar]

I believe Walmart offers $4 generic drugs in several states.
Also, several drug companies have discount programs for uninsured patients. Their websites have more details.

 

[JessicaAnn]

Is there a public health clinic you can go to? Perhaps they can give you the medication you need free of charge or at a reduced cost.