Am I being generous Enuff?

[gman]

Heres the deal. Am unable to work due to ill health. I have 3 kids to buy xmas pressies for. One is my step son and other two are my own. But I treat them all the same, despite being seperated from their mother.
I get about £90 per week (approx $180). On each child I am spending £70 ($140) on pressies. And i feel bad coz i feel its not a lot. Thing is, they will get from their Mother and her boyfriend who prolly have a combined income of prob near £80 000 ($160 000). Further to that, they will get from their nana and aunties etc.

Do you think I have spent enuff on em?

 

[redhotswami]

gman, you have spent what you could. i'm sure your kids would rather not see you homeless. you're giving them in presents more than half of what you get in a month!

i don't know your kids. but i think more than the presents themselves, the generosity is the time you spend with them and tell them how much you love them.

 

[gman]

My kids have already seen me homeless!!
I know the stuff they are getting from me is toys they have asked for. They are the least expectant, demanding kids I have ever encountred. They never ask for toys etc anythime of the year.
But it is myself that feels its not a lot.

 

[Liesje]

gman, you have spent what you could. i'm sure your kids would rather not see you homeless. you're giving them in presents more than half of what you get in a month!

i don't know your kids. but i think more than the presents themselves, the generosity is the time you spend with them and tell them how much you love them.

Ditto that. $140 per kid is more than my parents spent and they WERE both working! On the other hand, my rich uncle spoils my cousins rotten and they are really messed up because of it. They have entitlement attitudes and are very disrespectful and ungrateful because all their lives, they were just handed anything they wanted and didn't actually spend time with their dad.

 

[gman]

Well.......my kids arent short on affection and quality time with me. They know how much they mean to me. I have made a point of that as, a kid growing up, affection wasnt shown by my parents. I know wat you mean about kids getting what they want etc Liesje.......something I can say doesnt apply to my kids. Thats not to say they understand how to look after their toys etc yet.

 

[BonosBaby12]

I think you are doing the best that you can for them. Based on what you have said they are not going to be ungrateful with what they receive. My parent's had 7 kid's to buy for and each Christmas money was always tight. We were happy with just getting that one gift that we REALLY wanted.

 

[Bonochick]

You are doing all that you can. It sounds like your kids are very loved and very nice, I think they will be fine with things. I think it's more of a matter of you being fine with it...and you should be.

Merry Christmas.

 

[JCOSTER]

I think your kids would love the presents you bought them regardless if it were $ 140 or $14,000. They sound like great kids. You must be doing a good job with them. Don't be hard on yourself...your more than thinking of them being worried about you spent. What you spent is way enough. If it helps at all I spend $250 on each no matter what they want. My one son wanted the wii and thats all hes getting.

 

[zuropa_fit]

It sounds like the adults in their lives, you included, have done a good job raising kids who aren't greedy and understand the value of a dollar. Do what you can and don't feel guilty. Even if kids don't realize it now, most people realize sooner or later that time is more important than stuff. I think that's a lot to spend on a kid but my family is not really into lots of present giving. My in-laws however...

Point is, you can't compare yourself to others. And you definetly shouldn't compare your financial present giving to the love you feel for your kids and it seems like they'll get that.

 

[Galeongirl]

it's a really good thing if you give your kids what you want and not spoil them with the shit that kids get these days...
I've seen so many spoiled little brats bigmouthing adults, it's making me sick...

You're doing the good thing, giving them what you can, and giving the gesture of christmas with that... it's not about the money or what you get, it's about giving something to the persons you love and care about!

 

[gman]

Muchas Gracias ppl for your answers. They all make me feel better.
I guess I am lucky having such undemanding kids. I once played a joke on Lewis (my 7 yr old) when he came to stay. I told him i had no money for food so would he manage with just drinks of water for 2 days. He thought about it and sed it was ok, he didnt mind. And he would have too, thats how he is. Guess I been lucky with my kids.

 

[zuropa_fit]

Give them a big hug and thank your lucky stars for such great kids. Then give yourself a hug too!

 

[Lila64]

Sounds like you're a great dad with great kids
You do the best you got with what you got. It's not about how much money you spend.

 

[Mr. Green Eyes]

I agree with the others on this. You sound like a great dad, your kids are lucky to have you as a father.