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Old 02-15-2009, 12:02 PM   #1
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What do you need?

Perhaps this is old and boring, but I wanted to share.

This is kind of fun. Google your first name and the word "needs." For example, "Phil needs." Record the first ten things that come up. Here's mine:

Phil needs....

1. to start an antidote within 48 hours
2. to help AT&T and Verizon
3. needs and benefits.
4. more attentions than a "normal" boy but we treat him as a "normal" child as much as possible
5. a car in the Cape Winelands
6. to die!!
7. margins along sides of windows
8. constant care
9. child as a puzzle
10. to be rethought
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Old 02-15-2009, 12:13 PM   #2
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Dan needs...

1. your help!
2. life support.
3. to answer tough questions.
4. to improve tactically and mentally.
5. to overcome himself.
6. tech support.
7. your home remedies.
8. a kidney.
9. a shave
10. a slump buster.
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Old 02-15-2009, 12:17 PM   #3
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Alicia needs...

1. to let Jeremy take full responsibility
2. more funky beats and innovative tunes in her music
3. a very special environment in which she will be protected, cared for, and loved
4. corrective surgery on her hips in the future because she's missing some of her toes.
5. to apologize for conceited comment
6. to find money to pay for her last semester
7. a freshman class president slogan
8. to know if there are scissors, crayons, paper, and pencils available at home
9. to quit making out with that microphone
10. to continue to challenge herself in terms of the level of thinking, leadership, and writing abilities.

(I feel I must add that #2, #5 and #9 are the hazards of sharing a name with a famous pop singer. Thanks, Alicia Keys!)
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Old 02-15-2009, 12:19 PM   #4
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Ashley needs
1) to keep wearing stuff like this.
2) an escape
3) you like water in her lungs
4) to get something off her chest
5) help
6) to get a new agent.
7) a nap.
8) to take control of *his* club
9) needs prayer
10) must spend big.


Dang, I'm pretty emo.

Also, like Cori, many of mine are for Ashley Olsen.
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Old 02-15-2009, 12:25 PM   #5
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GAF needs...

1. Real women with real sound systems
2. To stop sending drinks now
3. To touch his roots
4. Our prayers
5. A poke in the other eye
6. To buy a tractor and a mower with at least an 8 ft. deck
7. A new shift key
8. Help
9. A moment to compose himself after breaking the news of Tom DeLay's indictment for campaign finance violations
10. To put out an album
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Old 02-15-2009, 12:28 PM   #6
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André needs
1. to be slapped
2. to stop harassing me
3. money
4. to STOP singing like NOW
5. nickname
6. to play to such large arenas
7. to accept that no-one is self-sufficient all the time
8. maximum support to ensure his safety
9. to make up his mind about the future of the group
10. to just sit back and learn everything he can
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"And as for Bono, he needs a colostomy bag for his mouth."

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Old 02-15-2009, 12:30 PM   #7
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Justin needs...

1. to start playing Smash bros. again.
2. needs your help.
3. needs to bring humble back.
4. needs a date.
5. needs a partner to sing with at the Grammys in February.
6. needs an attitude adjustment.
7. needs help to get to CPAC.
8. needs a wash.
9. needs structure.
10. needs - Australia.

What did I ever do to Google?! The CPAC one is just cruel.
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Old 02-15-2009, 12:45 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by corianderstem View Post
Alicia needs...
4. corrective surgery on her hips in the future because she's missing some of her toes.
It's okay.


Kip needs:

1. meme
2. volunteers!
3. your number
4. to be aware of all facets of our Town government, particularly how it affects education, but also how it affects our Town services in general
5. to raise money for the fee
6. to get some sun
7. someone to adopt him and pro- vide a safe and secure home
8. to complete a total of over 30 triathlons of varying lengths
9. to recall this model
10. to shut the fuck up!
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Old 02-15-2009, 12:50 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by angelordevil View Post
It's okay.
I loved that one, too. That particular Alicia was a cat needing to be adopted.
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Old 02-15-2009, 01:00 PM   #10
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Natalie needs...

1. a nightie
2. to get a life
3. your support
4. your prayers and support
5. to go
6. insulin injections twice daily
7. your vote
8. to relax
9. a bad boy on a motorcycle(!)
10. some cheering up
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Old 02-15-2009, 01:45 PM   #11
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I'm a mess

Mindy needs...

1. to find support so she won't have to feel like she needs to flirt for attention or to be accepted
2. to read this
3. to focus on putting her life in order, getting and staying sober, and being a mother to her son
4. to stay committed to rehab, or the mental hospital, for as long as it takes this time to get better
5. to get her life together, she needs to leave billy and seek some serious help
6. to clean up her act she goes through men like i change pants
7. to give Nicole Ritchie's attorney a call
8. a donut to drown her sorrows
9. GUIDANCE FROM A PERSON WHO CARES ENOUGH TO SAY NO (in caps, no less!)
10. to find a financial backer

Apparently, there's a country singer named Mindy McCready who needs a lot of help
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Old 02-15-2009, 01:49 PM   #12
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Mike needs:

1) To find a date
2) To get a clue, RIGHT NOW
3) Mike needs help
4) A Wee (Not sure if I need to go to the bathroom, or if Wii is just misspelled here)
5) A Heart
6) Dave's help (If this refers to Dave C, fuck that)
7) Your Help
8) To calm down
9) To flex my muscles
10) A Vacation

I like #10.
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Old 02-15-2009, 02:22 PM   #13
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This may be my most successful thread ever.
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Old 02-15-2009, 02:47 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by No spoken words View Post
6) Dave's help (If this refers to Dave C, fuck that)
Maybe you need some help introducing a knuckle sandwich to your face, huh?

It's okay, I wouldn't want your assistance anyways.

Dave needs:

1. to just win the Western final, baby!
2. ... to work one of these into his live appearances.
3. a bike.
4. a drummer for the SWEETEST DEATHCORE BAND ON THE PLANET!!!
5. a shower.
6. "Apparently Dave needs pants."
7. a timeout.
8. ... some servers, and I guarantee the money will be sweet! Come in and apply in person between 12 and 6.
9. to make a pit-stop on the way home.
10. ... a little "friendly help", if you catch my meaning.
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Old 02-15-2009, 02:55 PM   #15
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Lila needs:

1. to enlist as many people as it can in order to fulfill its vision ...
2. a programmer
3. your prayers
4. RP partner, maybe more
5. to be washed
6. to be experienced before it can be understood
7. to Go......
8. lots of love and care
9. to pay this balance
10. no one to be great
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