Panic in U2 online fan community

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financeguy

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Panic in U2 online fan community

It has been revealed that, following Bono's recent remarks praising the Popmart tour, moderators of online U2 fan communities such as interference.com were flooded with thousands of requests to delete or edit historical posts. Bono has also reportedly ordered a crack SWAT team from Principle Management to seek out and terminate any online posts criticising the tour and the album that spawned it. Those with over 100 posts slagging off the Pop era are said to be particularly concerned.

Several posters unconvincingly claimed they were 'only joking' when they previously contributed posts criticising the Pop era.

Larry Mullen is reported to be 'not amused' at Bono's unprecedented volte-face, but is also said to be reluctantly 'considering his position in the light of the change in the Leader's policy'.
 
If this leads to bannings (or worse :uhoh: :evil: ), I'm all for it! :hyper:
 
Black hummers were seen leaving the band's Clarence Hotel, Dublin compound. Also Neil McCormack was seen being thrown (again) from the hotel roof. No further comment was forthcoming.
 
what youre saying is, people aren't really that bright and they have short attn. spans. If only we could text our replies here...um

keep it simple :hug::heart:

:lock:
 
Larry, shirtless and belligerent, was understood to have attacked several reporters and onlookers for no reason outside the hotel compound. According to Principle insiders, Larry hasn't been the same since he had to sell the empty village he previously resided in, along with his Harley collection.
 
Adam unveils deep unrest

Over a few quiet whiskeys, the lapsed alcoholic Adam Clayton recently admitted to reporters that he's been 'trying to find an out' of U2 for twelve years, but is just too darn polite to come up with an excuse.

"I tried saying I was going out for cigarettes and some bread, but they didn't believe me since I quit the smokes too," Clayton said.

"I even said maybe we were running low on stationery, but the guys reminded me that we have a vast multinational corporation to handle that stuff for us now. So I couldn't, in all conscience, find any convincing reason to leave the room. I even said that should be the name of the next album: Reasons Why You Can't Leave The Room."

Clayton confided to me that he loves drinking and smoking, and that actually it was the heady goats' head brew of rock success that spiked his pleasures in a most unappealing way. Unfortunately, with Larry at the helm, the band's chart success shows no sign of abating.

"I was hoping to procrastinate us into a 2012 release date, by which time maybe the world would have forgotten about us. But alas, not to be".

With a sigh, Clayton ground his cigarette under one well-heeled boot, and wearily prepared to gear up for yet another soul-destroying world tour of intimate stadiums - sorry, stadia - and arenas.

"I'd rather hear the death rattle of my only child than launch into Bullet The Blue Sky once more on stage," he joked. "Please, stop me from walking out of this room."
 
oh boy, that adam, the quiet one always telling like it is. It's almost like I already knew somehow what he was going to say.
 
yeah, i imagine you would.

can anyone tell me where this "omg is bono ok?!?!" business originated from? directly after 9/11?
 
Yes. It was totally 9/11. Cause bono just got a place in New York. Like he said in the song.

And, naturally, people wondered if he was ok.

Interesting coincidence, the line 'women and children first' was used on both U2 and Radiohead albums of 2000. But in very different ways. Or not.

Also, Thom didn't get a place in New York. Nobody ever asks if Thom is ok, and I'd say there's far more cause for concern if you take the songs at face value.:angry:
 
i honestly don't know if you're being serious or not... because that's truely absurd.

people were wondering about bono in the midst of 9/11 BECAUSE HE HAS A FLAT THERE?
 
yeah, i imagine you would.

can anyone tell me where this "omg is bono ok?!?!" business originated from? directly after 9/11?

It actually originated in October 2006 when Yankees pitcher Cory Lidle was killed after he crashed his plane into a New York City apartment building. Before all the details of the crash came to light, people were expressing concern about Bono's well-being.
 
It actually originated in October 2006 when Yankees pitcher Cory Lidle was killed after he crashed his plane into a New York City apartment building. Before all the details of the crash came to light, people were expressing concern about Bono's well-being.

wow. that's actually, somehow, worse.
 
it's been rumored that somewhere around the 2:30 mark of that posted youtube video - amidst the smoke and bono's hypnotic camera thrusts - adam made a desperate bid to retreat back up to the lemon. larry, however (ever alert, industrious, & innovative), used only his teeth to rip the buttons (being merely decorative) from his shirt and spit them directly on to adam's escape path, ultimately creating a rather awkward episode for not only adam, but the band.
 
is it true, guys, that after u2 Larry plans on buying an entire city in Utah and will live out his existence as a mormon?

Yes. Yes it is quite true. I have had it reliably confirmed by a source deep within Principle Management.
 
alright guys, i think this has gone on plenty long enough.

time to reign things in and cool off, guys. hit the showers and get changed, gang.

:lock:
 
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