Women Lose 90 Percent of Eggs by Age 30 - Page 4 - U2 Feedback

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Old 02-01-2010, 11:29 PM   #46
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You certainly implied it by asking why any adult would consider having a child knowing they were going to put them in daycare.
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Old 02-01-2010, 11:31 PM   #47
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You're right, you didn't - I'm sorry. But your response to anitram was puzzling, then. I thought what she said was a valid response to your question. You asked why, she gave an example, you said that had nothing to do with what you meant.

My apologies if I'm wrong, but it read a bit like you were trying to ... well, pick a fight, for lack of a better term.

Edit: Pfan is apparently sharing my brain tonight. And editing it in the process.
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Old 02-01-2010, 11:34 PM   #48
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No, I did not try to pick a fight.

Martina would be the last person I would want to do this.
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Old 02-01-2010, 11:35 PM   #49
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I read my post and I honestly don't see how that could have been perceived. Oh well.
I love FYM.
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Old 02-01-2010, 11:37 PM   #50
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i think daycare arises out of economic necessity more often than not.

i also think that there are some parents (usually women) who would be *miserable* if they had to give up their careers and stay home full time. and if being a stay-at-home parent makes you miserable, then your kids are going to be miserable. much better to work part-time, or full time, and be a part-time positive influence than be an omnipresent bringer of misery to a child.

but back to costs.

Memphis and i continue to give some time to talking about kids. and among the numerous obstacles in our path, one of the biggest truly is financial.

we're really no different than women over 30 who might need scientific assistance to conceive, or infertile couples who still wish to conceive.

i feel their pain. and with a house to pay for (you're looking at starting prices for a single family home easily over $400K in this area), as well as education, food, a car, etc., (not to mention, you know, having a wedding so that our family can be as secure as possible), i don't know how anyone could get by on a single income in any major urban area within 100 miles of either coast. Memphis and i both make not insignificant money, and while i'd love to stay at home or work part time (since my career has that kind of flexibility), i make way more than $1600 a month so out of financial necessity we'd have to look at day-care.
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Old 02-01-2010, 11:39 PM   #51
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RedRocksU2 View Post
This has nothing to do with what I meant.
This is the part I don't get, then. What did you mean, if her answer wasn't what you were looking for?

I knew "pick a fight" wasn't the right phrase. It read to me like you were very passionate/angry about what you've seen and experienced, and wanted the chance to bring it up, and just went kind of a funky route to get there.

But you're the author, and obviously I'm misreading, so you can either choose to explain it or .... not, if you don't want to get into it.
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Old 02-01-2010, 11:39 PM   #52
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Old 02-01-2010, 11:40 PM   #53
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Hell, that works. Pass the flask!
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Old 02-01-2010, 11:45 PM   #54
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Never mind.
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Old 02-01-2010, 11:49 PM   #55
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oh goody *tosses birth control pills*
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Old 02-02-2010, 02:07 AM   #56
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Kinda freaked out by that, but I sort of plan to adopt, anyway.

Then again, it depends on what Mr. As-Right-As-I-Can-Possibly-Find thinks.
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Old 02-02-2010, 02:19 AM   #57
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Quote:
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i think daycare arises out of economic necessity more often than not.
exactly. 50 years ago, your average woman graduated high school, got married, then became a housewife. these days the option of the wife staying at home is not feasible for the average couple. it sucks. but unfortunately, these days, not only is the woman required to work, now you have to get a college education too. and some fields are leaning towards you needing a master's degree to get anything other than entry level.

obviously i'm not knocking any woman out there who does this. the point i'm making though is unless you can get married out of high school and become a housewife, the option to have a child before 30 is limited, unless you don't mind being pregnant while in school or before your student loans are paid off.
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Old 02-02-2010, 02:27 AM   #58
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Some of you are talking about the risks of going through with a "later" pregnancy, and I just wanted to say from my own personal experiences, I just don't see it. My mother has been pregnant three times since she turned 34, the first was my brother Ben, who was supposed to be a twin, but the other didn't make it, the next two were miscarriages, the first of which had Downs Syndrome. (Though, on the other hand, I love my little brother with all of my heart, so, perhaps risk is outweighed by reward after all)

It's obviously a personal choice, but, as far as I'm concerned, I'm not going to try after 35, that's when surgeries will take place >_>
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Old 02-02-2010, 03:14 AM   #59
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Increased risk simply means that there's more of a chance that something could go wrong.

I was the only one of my mother's children to be born before she turned 35. She had one miscarriage after that.
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Old 02-02-2010, 05:50 AM   #60
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There's a need for only one egg to get pregnant. Women usually have 400,000 eggs when they reach menstruation. The 10% you have left by the age of 30 is worth 40,000. I think that's more than enough until menopause (that has to do more with the ovaries producing lower and lower levels of certain hormones, not the number of eggs left).

You can argue that the quality of the eggs declines with age, but so does the sperm's quality. Miscarriage is not to be blamed on the female solely. Many times natural abortion takes place because of a severe genetic disorder the fetus suffer from– and that's related to the father just as well.

Sometimes there's a gap between a certain research objective results and the conclusion the researcher draws from them. I wonder what made Dr.Simckes urge women to get pregnant before the age of 30, and also how much effort is put into urging men to become fathers. I've seen very little pressure put on men to have children by a certain age.

I think Women today realize more and more that the deal their mothers got was not that great. Having children can be a wonderful thing, but nowadays most chances are your partner is still not expected to make the same compromises in his life like you do to raise them. That brings women into having children at a later and later age or not at all, and that just pisses some people (don't know about Dr.Smickes specifically)

You should have children when (and if) you're ready for it, not when someone else tells you to.
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