The Petraeus Affair

[Pearl]

I really doubt narcissistic traits in leaders is something new. I'm sure Julius Caesar, Napolean Bonaparte, Henry VIII and many others would be considered narcissists.

 

[Irvine511]

i walked by the reporter camp outside the house this woman is supposedly hiding out in. only a couple of cameras pointed up the steps. no one has seen her, so i suppose she's Peapod-ing?

the house is gorgeous -- i've admired it in passing for years.

As Paula Broadwell holes up in D.C. house, camped-out media wait in patience - The Washington Post



and that's all i really have to contribute to this silly story.

 

[purpleoscar]

I really doubt narcissistic traits in leaders is something new. I'm sure Julius Caesar, Napolean Bonaparte, Henry VIII and many others would be considered narcissists.

It's certainly not new. That's why I like the symbol of the ring in Lord of the Rings on how power and success can tempt people to follow their base ego desires. It seems so unnecessary but people fall for it generation after generation.

 

[ladyfreckles]

I'm torn on this issue because on one hand I have no idea why I should care or why it's on my news feed and on the other hand it's really fun to speculate.

Cheating is a funny thing. I've seen it justified in multiple ways and I understand the arguments and sentiment behind it but I still see no "valid" excuse for it. Going behind the back of somebody who trusts you not to is a horrible thing to do, especially when it risks STDs, pregnancy, or other repercussions (condoms are not 100% effective in preventing STDs). Open relationships are an entirely different scenario here because the couple has actually talked about it and they are okay with the decision.

At the same time, I don't believe this woman was a saint. She exhibits jealous and possessive behavior of a man that is already somebody else's wife. I think on some level she was stupid and young, but that argument only goes so far. I'm young and I'm not that naive. Getting involved with a married government official and hoping to gain anything other than liability is just plain moronic. In short, both of them made immoral and stupid decisions that greatly disrespected other people.

In this case he had a lot to lose from cheating and it seems like there's a risk of him having given away information to the woman he cheated with. You always get found out, even if the affair has been over for years, and when your spouse (or in this case the entire country you serve) finds out the wound will be fresh, new and brutal even though you've had time to get over it. I think there was not a lot of critical thinking going on here and that this guy has let his ego get to his head. He is no longer a good candidate for that high ranking position.

Personally, I don't trust anyone who shows that they make such poor life decisions to hold a high ranking defense position in government. This isn't even a moral thing, it's about common sense and having respect for other human beings.

I applaud him for stepping down gracefully though.

 

[Pearl]

At the same time, I don't believe this woman was a saint. She exhibits jealous and possessive behavior of a man that is already somebody else's wife. I think on some level she was stupid and young, but that argument only goes so far. I'm young and I'm not that naive. Getting involved with a married government official and hoping to gain anything other than liability is just plain moronic. In short, both of them made immoral and stupid decisions that greatly disrespected other people.

Paula is 40 years old, so in no way was she being "young". She knew what she was doing and didn't care about hurting others. It is best to say that she simply has very little or no morals.

 

[MrsSpringsteen]

Well 40 compared to 60 is young. Obviously he isn't young either.
She's young as far as maturity level in her decision making and other areas, perhaps.

People make big mistakes and foolish decisions. But yes- when you get involved with a married person it is just morally wrong, ultimately. I think it is possible to have morals and still make at least one immoral decision out of foolishness and stupidity, temporary madness, etc. It is still an immoral one, of course.

I don't know nearly enough about her to know what possessed her to do it. She does have a husband and two kids, so for me that should have been her primary consideration. Not to mention the general' s wife and kids and how it's hurting them.

Once you have those people in your life, for me that's a game changer and I don't get how you can do that to them.Rationalizing and compartmentalizing your life somehow, I guess.

 

[Pearl]

Well 40 compared to 60 is young. Obviously he isn't young either.
She's young as far as maturity level in her decision making and other areas, perhaps.

Well "young" isn't the word I would use toward a 40 year old. It makes it sound like she's a petulant child. Also to me, at certain age, immaturity no longer implies because I think by age 30, 40, 50 or whatever, there is something more wrong with certain behaviors than just being immature.

 

[MrsSpringsteen]

I just meant that's she's young compared to a 60 year old. The world tends to have a perception that any female over 40 is old/no longer young, no longer attractive, etc. I don't share that belief.

There are plenty of people in their 30' s and 40's and older who are emotionally immature. It's selfishness too, just doing what you want and basically saying screw anyone else's feelings. Selfishness knows no age limit.

 

[Pearl]

I just meant that's she's young compared to a 60 year old. The world tends to have a perception that any female over 40 is old/no longer young, no longer attractive, etc. I don't share that belief.

Neither do I. But I think when ladyfreckles said young, she didn't mean youthful looks.

There are plenty of people in their 30' s and 40's and older who are emotionally immature. It's selfishness too, just doing what you want and basically saying screw anyone else's feelings. Selfishness knows no age limit.

I agree with the selfishness part, that it knows no age limit. But I also think it's not OK to be immature at a certain age. I might seem strict when it comes to personal development, but then again, I'm a perfectionist. Even I get annoyed when I exhibit childlike behaviors which I blame on other issues rather than immaturity.