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Old 10-22-2017, 01:12 AM   #46
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It has been over a decade – how has your life really changed?

Felt like chiming in on this old thread ... in 2006 I was working for the internal production company of a major cable network doing mildly interesting stuff. I was offered a job at a hungry, young production company, made myself indispensable, and my career took off. I’ve been there 10 years and have produced cable series on a wide variety of topics and traveled extensively across the US and even internationally. Its been a great ride, but I need a change — am taking steps to move into narrative fiction. Eventually, we will likely move west (my husband’s great job keeps us in DC for the time being).

In 2006, I had just gotten together with my husband, and we were pretty madly in love. I didnt think then that we’d be legally married in 10 years. We were on the front lines of enormous (but very simple) social change. We went to protests and demonstrations in front of the White House, and were there celebrating when SCOTUS legalized SSM a few years later.

Marriage has been a profound experience in many ways, and I am grateful for my husband every day. We moved from a cheap apartment to a decent apartment to buying a townhouse in the heart of DC and will very soon be moving into one of the few remaining single family homes within the district. We have a dog, and occasionally talk about kids. Right now, we’re career-focused and consumed by real estate. We also travel widely.

Also in the past 10 years I lost a beloved grandmother to dimentia and then an immediate family member in an accident. I myself was seriously injured while exercising. So there’s been trauma as well. I also have two awesome nephews who I don’t see enough.

Life for the most part is equal parts love and work, and I’m grateful to have both.
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Old 10-22-2017, 12:22 PM   #47
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I haven't posted here since 2013. I read occasionally but left posting for a couple different reasons. I sure wish my life could be what it was like a decade ago. Three years ago I went through a horrible situation, not anything I'd ever want to talk about here but I made it through.

Two and a half years ago I became the caregiver for my Mom, she is now dying of cancer and coming home tomorrow for hospice care. I don't know how long she has left and how I'm ever going to do it even with their help.

Throughout it all people have never failed to disappoint me. Most of all my own "family" other than my Mom but that really was no surprise . Friends who are too "busy". I've met strangers who have treated me with more kindness and in little ways most days made my own family. I've been forced to open up more to people, my guard is always up but it's a daily process.

One good thing is that I'm not the same person at all that I was before all this. For the better. I've done things I never thought I could. I have better self esteem and self confidence. I have zero tolerance anymore for less than what I deserve, zero tolerance for certain types of people. Pain of the highest order forces you to filter.

My Mom had about a year during which she was better. Last October we did early voting together and I had tears in my eyes as we voted for a woman for President. Instead we got a ridiculous misogynist narcissist who is ruining what was left of this country. Life really is unfair, to my Mom and to all of us.

U2 isn't even on my radar anymore, I know they went out on tour. The first time I had tickets but couldn't go because I was taking care of my Mom. I went to one Bruce concert when we had a home health aide. I have had very little for me and that is a hard life. I hang on hoping there's a better life for me somewhere down the line...but most days it's hard to hold on to that hope.

I have one friend from here who I still stay in touch with, she has been a true and loyal friend and supported me throughout. And I hope I have been and done same for her.
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Old 10-22-2017, 12:35 PM   #48
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Big hug, Mrs S.
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Old 10-22-2017, 01:02 PM   #49
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Mrs S
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Old 10-22-2017, 06:14 PM   #50
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MrsS. It is very, very hard. I did what you are doing for my grandmother, but had help. My parents were mostly involved and I was the primary one when they went overseas. She was dying of Alzheimer's for many years. It really takes a toll on you and you forget to take care of yourself most of the time. It's a very selfless thing but it isn't easy.

I wish peace for your Mom in her last days and an easy journey. Thoughts and prayers your way.
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Old 10-26-2017, 05:55 PM   #51
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Sending loving thoughts, Mrs. S. Take time for yourself, too. Then you'll be able to give more to others, Listen to some good music and let Bono's beautiful lyrics and voice remind you of some good things. God bless.
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Old 11-08-2017, 01:34 AM   #52
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i was in college.

i did a lot of drugs.

i (barely) graduated from college.

i joined the army.

i got married.

i quit the army.

i moved halfway across the country twice.

i got a career in a good industry.

i got divorced.

i got laid off.

i did a lot of drugs.

i was homeless.

i got an apartment.

i got a girlfriend.

i got a job.

i got a much better career in a much better industry.

i bought a condo.

i'm going to marry my girlfriend.

my life is amazing now.

that pretty much sums up the last 10 years for me.
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Old 11-08-2017, 01:36 AM   #53
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Much love, man
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Old 11-08-2017, 01:49 AM   #54
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it's been a crazy 10 years. i thought for a long time that i couldn't really make a post in this thread that didn't turn into 10,000 boring words about myself - apparently i just needed to smoke some high-octane weed and not think too much about it.

i'm super excited about the next 10.
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Old 11-08-2017, 01:53 AM   #55
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DaveC View Post
it's been a crazy 10 years. i thought for a long time about how to make a post in this thread that didn't turn into 10,000 words - turns out i just needed to smoke some high-octane weed and not think too much about it.

i'm super excited about the next 10.
It was a good post. I enjoy your posts, especially the political ones a year or so back! Always sobering and inspiring to read about hardship and resilience and overcoming shitty shit. All the best, sir.
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Old 11-14-2017, 11:19 AM   #56
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For myself, I stopped posting here regularly, largely because I got burnt out on politics, got tired of arguing all the time and came to enjoy reading and listening more. Philosophy, theology, history, foreign languages...all very enjoyable pursuits these days.

I'm happy, though, that a lot of the kinds of things I used to argue about all those years ago are now more mainstream ideas.
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Old 11-15-2017, 03:06 PM   #57
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I was in high school. I was a centrist. My only real hobby was following sports.

I'm in my mid-20s and have a full-time job at a small business. I am a far leftist. My hobbies are following sports, going to concerts, and drinking.
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Old 11-15-2017, 04:07 PM   #58
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It has been over a decade – how has your life really changed?

Quote:
Originally Posted by DaveC View Post
it's been a crazy 10 years. i thought for a long time that i couldn't really make a post in this thread that didn't turn into 10,000 boring words about myself - apparently i just needed to smoke some high-octane weed and not think too much about it.

i'm super excited about the next 10.


Can you tell me the Bae-veC story in full some time? It sounds like it could be a movie. Very interesting.
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Old 11-15-2017, 04:38 PM   #59
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In 2006 I was 14 and just starting high school. From the ages 14-18 I was an apathetic robot with no emotions portrayed. Probably borderline depressed but repressed. Moved about three hours north to Orlando to attend UCF for my undergrad where my true "coming of age" story began. I discovered music and I discovered sexuality simultaneously! As I started my undergrad I sort of let all of my emotions out. It was easy to do when I was disconnected from my friends of a former life, being alone in a new world. I learned really quickly that those folks were never really my friends, but more of just circumstance. So, I quietly slipped out the back door from my former life and started anew when I finished my first year of undergrad. This included three things: making new friends, exercise, and coming out. I found balance to my chaos in running, and expression in music. I made some great friends, who to this day I would say are all my best friends. I finished undergrad in aerospace engineering and another in some long drawn out computational title with a bunch of astronomy stuffs.

As I finished, I had my only real non-flingy experience with someone in the form of unrequited love for a solid two years. The kind where you knew the true thing from the get go but you don't give up on because you want it. Anyways yeah, real damaging, hate people now etc.

I really wanted to do Astro for a phd but lacked the pure physics background for it so I was universally rejected on all of my applications at the time. But, in darkness came light. Grad school didn't like my scrappy jack of all trades/master of none profile, but one mentor at NASA did. She gave me a chance at an internship working on what is effectively strategic mission analysis for NASA's Journey to Mars. It was the break I needed after so many downers at the time. I made the best of it, absolutely killed it, really gave me some fire.

During that time I realized that I couldn't be complacent. I needed to have life experiences. I am a space explorer as much as I am a world explorer. I wanted to live abroad, and I didn't want to settle down. So, I chose to do a masters in the same subject I did my internship in, but over here in England. I chose the program because it offered to put me on a six month assignment living in Italy working in industry, living in France, and living in the Netherlands working at ESA. The project was a massive success, and saw a flurry of proceedings and publications. I got to see some 20 countries on four continents. Really, the whole of the moon.

But, in the meanwhile, my social life collapsed. I experienced a number of issues upon moving abroad that absolutely spiked my anxiety and put me out of proper rest. For two months I was left without a proper home by my university because they inexplicably cancelled my loans. Moved hostel to hotel to Airbnb etc etc whatever I could find, some 15-20 times in those two months. All in the meanwhile, I was doing a degree. When that was over, I went home for three weeks (but home is SFla/Orlando/NYC/DC these days so it's a lot of moving around to see family). January was exams. February was end of 2nd semester work. March was moving to Italy and the project - we hit the ground running and every single weekend on the project I went somewhere new in Europe to make the most of it). When it was done, I spent a month in Australia and New Zealand at a big conference and otherwise exploring.

I'm lucky. Very. I got to see a lot. More than plenty do in a lifetime. But, I'm tired. I haven't slept in the same bed for over three weeks since March of 2016. I miss my friends. I accidentally ended up "back in the closet" per say, not by shame or by choice, but rather because everything just moved so fast and the friendships around me weren't that strong. Every new city you go... you meet someone new... they don't wanna touch you with a ten foot poll. You're blacklisted, because you lack permanence.

So yeah, I've finally wrapped up this massive life experience. My body probably aged ten years in one, and I'm just super excited to do nothing for a few weeks come Monday. Come January I have another gig at NASA in Houston for four months - I fear short term now, and am already imagining how my next set of social experiences may fair. I have eight weeks to shake my cynicism, put a smile on, and be prepared to start again.


Sorry for the sloppy writing.
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Old 11-15-2017, 07:53 PM   #60
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You're doing pretty well mate sounds like one hell of a life you've lived. be kind to yourself. I'd seek therapy if you can - I know it's been a huge help for my anxiety
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