College freshman commits suicide after sex tape posted on internet by roommate

[BVS]

I never said that. Read what I wrote above, and combine that with the idea that a 15 year old was once 14, and 13, and 12, and 11, and 10. There's more of a history with an older person. Essentially the older you get, the more battered and bruised you become. So these kids must've taken a pretty hard couple of first hits (if that analogy works for you).

You're either backtracking or you're not making your point clear at all.

You kept saying there must be something more, that you think the suicides are being influenced by others.

Why can't it just be that they were bullied that much?

 

[KhanadaRhodes]

Are you suggesting the opposite? Do you really think that kids run home and tell their parents everything? Even more - do you think that these kids are forced to see each other?

i sure as hell told my mom whenever i was bullied. one point in elementary school it got so bad the school finally had to intervene when this girl threatened to come to my house and murder me because i wore glasses.

and yes, elementary school (funnily enough it was in kissimmee, since i noticed you're from orlando). i forget my exact age but it had to be somewhere from 2nd-4th grade.

 

[martha]

Are you suggesting the opposite? Do you really think that kids run home and tell their parents everything? Even more - do you think that these kids are forced to see each other?

And they NEVER, EVER post anything nasty on each other's Facebook or Myspace pages. They leave all that at school.

And the parents never, ever call the school and let them know about the bullies in class. Ever.

 

[A stor]

It's easy to know if you're straight... go ahead and talk to some homosexual people. Some figure it out early... others dont.

That's not the point though. Completely off it, really. It's the point that no kindergardener (see the post below you) comes out of the closet or gets ridiculed for being homosexual. That stuff happens when? In middle school. You start middle school turning 12 years old. The fact is that this kid, in all likelihood, was only mocked/teased/bullied/these terms are all synonymous/etc. for about a year or two. Most people who go through this suffer for years before taking that option.

There is more to this than just a kid who was bullied.

Why would it be any easier to know if I am "straight?" Your words not mine.

I'm in my early fifties and probably have a little more life experience. Homosexuals were not so shocking for us. Sure, there has always been an element of school yard bullying. Not exclusive to gay folks and it certainly wasn't posted on the web, Since, it didn't exist. My best friend through out junior high and high school was gay. Most of his friends were not.

 

[Jive Turkey]

i sure as hell told my mom whenever i was bullied. one point in elementary school it got so bad the school finally had to intervene when this girl threatened to come to my house and murder me because i wore glasses.

You better still not wear those glasses, KhanadaRhodes

 

[LuckyNumber7]

You're either backtracking or you're not making your point clear at all.

You kept saying there must be something more, that you think the suicides are being influenced by others.

Why can't it just be that they were bullied that much?

Neither! You're just not reading what's in front of you. There is something more, something more than just being mocked for being homosexual. I know plenty of people who get mocked for it. They put up with it. It's life, that's what life throws at you.

You know how Tyler Clementi was driven that far? Because something more than being mocked happened. Someone invaded his privacy. Someone absolutely humiliated him. I'm sure he was mocked and teased enough about being gay by some, and that drove him over the top.

You dont think it's a possibility that each one of these suicides is influencing the next? We're up to about 7 now in 3 weeks. I mean, is it not possible that one suicide could've sent a message to the next poor victim?

I never said they were not bullied enough. Jesus, it's not even worth it if you're gonna keep assuming I've been saying so many things.

 

[A stor]

kids use the words "gay" and "fag" and whatever as schoolyard taunts from a very young age, if memory serves around 3rd grade.

we should also remember that straight kids, and prepubescent kids, can be the victim of homophobic bullying as well.

Irvine, you have brought up very important points. My son, when he was in elementary school, fourth grade. Came home and asked me what does "fag" mean? I told him it was a very bad curse word and that we don't use language like that.

My son actualy went through this. Being called gay, even though he is heterosexual. Because some of his friends were going to the "after school orgy partys." Between the ages of twelve to fourteen. My son never went to them. As if, his dad and I would have ever allowed it. He focused on his studies. Has a good job in the computer field and is very happily married to a lovely woman.

You'll never see them on the Maury show. "Who's your baby's daddy?"

 

[LuckyNumber7]

i sure as hell told my mom whenever i was bullied. one point in elementary school it got so bad the school finally had to intervene when this girl threatened to come to my house and murder me because i wore glasses.

and yes, elementary school (funnily enough it was in kissimmee, since i noticed you're from orlando). i forget my exact age but it had to be somewhere from 2nd-4th grade.

Well then I'm gonna go on a lead here and guess you're female? You see, that explains it. Most boys dont go running home telling their mom at 13 years old. Most of that is handled in school.

Cool that you're from Kissimee. I'm new here in Orlando, just got here in August. I'm a student at UCF.

And they NEVER, EVER post anything nasty on each other's Facebook or Myspace pages. They leave all that at school.

And the parents never, ever call the school and let them know about the bullies in class. Ever.

Now come on... that's like a scene straight out of a movie. You dont have to be friends with someone on MySpace and Facebook.

Most of the time the parents either know little about the bullying or nothing at all. Sometimes (and in the instance of Asher Brown) they did know and they tried to stop it and nothing was done.

 

[LuckyNumber7]

Why would it be any easier to know if I am "straight?" Your words not mine.

I'm in my early fifties and probably have a little more life experience. Homosexuals were not so shocking for us. Sure, there has always been an element of school yard bullying. Not exclusive to gay folks and it certainly wasn't posted on the web, Since, it didn't exist. My best friend through out junior high and high school was gay. Most of his friends were not.

Most people are straight. Most homosexuals feel early in their life that they're different, but they dont realize that they're gay until later on.

There are always the group of people who are confused when growing up. Some, but not all, end up realizing they're bisexual or homosexual. The majority of people growing up dont ever experience such confusion or bi-curious feelings.

I mean, I dont know if it was you who said it, but you knew the entire time apparently. So you wouldnt know.

You might have a little more life experience, but you dont have more experience as a teenager in middle and high school. In which case, you were there a while ago. I was just there. Not trying to sound like an ass, but I'd bet I know more of how teenagers function socially in middle school and high school.

 

[A stor]

Perhaps...

But, perception has to change. I am older and see more homophobia than was present in my school days.

 

[LuckyNumber7]

Perhaps...

But, perception has to change. I am older and see more homophobia than was present in my school days.

I understand, but that kind of stuff varies completely when you go home to home. For all we know some of these kids could've been rejected by their parents. Some of them could've been very quiet about it. It's a very particular topic, everyone is different.

 

[Irvine511]

My son actualy went through this. Being called gay, even though he is heterosexual.

Has a good job in the computer field and is very happily married to a lovely woman.

homophobic bullying hurts kids of all sexual orientations.

 

[A stor]

homophobic bullying hurts kids of all sexual orientations.

Thank you!

My son was made fun of during his teenage years because he wasn't sleeping around and is not a teenage daddy. He waited until he fell in love. Nothing wrong with that. Gay or straight. He wanted to complete his education which lead to a good paying job. Plus, he respects women. As a heterosexual man. Women are not to be used and tossed aside.

I am very proud of him. Even though, I thought at times, he was tuning me out. My message as a mom. Got through.

 

[A stor]

I understand, but that kind of stuff varies completely when you go home to home. For all we know some of these kids could've been rejected by their parents. Some of them could've been very quiet about it. It's a very particular topic, everyone is different.

I hope that these children were not rejected by their families.

I have two grown children and love them with all of my heart. They just happen to be heterosexual. But, if they were not. It wouldn't make one bit of difference to me or their dad.

 

[Moonlit_Angel]

My son was made fun of during his teenage years because he wasn't sleeping around and is not a teenage daddy. He waited until he fell in love. Nothing wrong with that. Gay or straight. He wanted to complete his education which lead to a good paying job. Plus, he respects women. As a heterosexual man. Women are not to be used and tossed aside.

Can we clone your son? I would love to see more men like this existing out there.

Angela

 

[BVS]

Neither! You're just not reading what's in front of you. There is something more, something more than just being mocked for being homosexual. I know plenty of people who get mocked for it. They put up with it. It's life, that's what life throws at you.

You know how Tyler Clementi was driven that far? Because something more than being mocked happened. Someone invaded his privacy. Someone absolutely humiliated him. I'm sure he was mocked and teased enough about being gay by some, and that drove him over the top.

I don't think you're reading the stories right, these kids are dealing with more than the average "mocking" or teasing. These kids are being bullied and harassed on a daily basis. That's not "what life throws at you".

I'm going to go out on a limb and guess you weren't bullied that much as a kid?

You dont think it's a possibility that each one of these suicides is influencing the next? We're up to about 7 now in 3 weeks. I mean, is it not possible that one suicide could've sent a message to the next poor victim?

HIGHLY unlikely from what we know about suicide and depression. Also there is no evidence that these 13 year olds even knew about the other stories.

I never said they were not bullied enough. Jesus, it's not even worth it if you're gonna keep assuming I've been saying so many things.

Calm down. You're just all over the place and keep clouding up your own point. You seem to have a hard time grasping that the day to day tormenting was enough to drive these kids to suicide. You keep looking for another explanation and saying "it's life".

How is it you expect a 13 year old to understand "that's what life throws at you" which is an incredibly difficult concept for a 13 year old, yet you don't believe such an "underdeveloped" mind can be depressed enough to consider suicide?

This is a very conflicting point of view. Can you not see that?

 

[Liesje]

 

[BVS]

Something I said?

 

[Liesje]

No, just, in general!

 

[martha]

Now come on... that's like a scene straight out of a movie. You dont have to be friends with someone on MySpace and Facebook.

Most of the time the parents either know little about the bullying or nothing at all. Sometimes (and in the instance of Asher Brown) they did know and they tried to stop it and nothing was done.

You're right. I'm wrong. I guess none of the phone calls parents make to my school, none of the instances of this reported in the news are real. They're all made up.

 

[Liesje]

They're just part of life, Martha, part of being a 13 year old boy...

 

[corianderstem]

Now come on... that's like a scene straight out of a movie. You dont have to be friends with someone on MySpace and Facebook.

So I take it you haven't heard about cyber-bullying and the extent kids are taking their bullying these days?

It's baffling to me that you think that's "straight out of a movie."

 

[A stor]

Can we clone your son? I would love to see more men like this existing out there.

Angela

Thank you Angela for the complement.

My husband and I are old fashion parents. We never hit our children but they always knew exactly what they were allowed to do and what they couldn't. I said it before. Life lessons begin at home. Praise your children for being who they are. Teach them through example to be polite and respectful of all others. All of us are different is some aspect. It is nothing to be afraid of. We should embrace these differences.

I give my husband a lot of credit. He always acts like a gentleman and never behaves in a vulgar fashion. Both of us have had "gay" friends. Neither one of us is homophobic. So our children aren't either. But, my point is that my son learned from his dad. How to be a man. My husband was never disrespectful towards anyone. Especially women.

It shocks me that young men and young women think that vulgar words such as bitch, slut, ho and etc. Are okay. They are not. It is abuse. I wonder if there parents use the same language.

There is a muslim teenage girl who's family are my neighbors. You will never hear filthy words out of her mouth. Her parents are the same way, always treating everyone with kindness and respect. Children learn what they see and parents are the strongest influence.

 

[A stor]

I don't think you're reading the stories right, these kids are dealing with more than the average "mocking" or teasing. These kids are being bullied and harassed on a daily basis. That's not "what life throws at you".

I'm going to go out on a limb and guess you weren't bullied that much as a kid?

HIGHLY unlikely from what we know about suicide and depression. Also there is no evidence that these 13 year olds even knew about the other stories.


Calm down. You're just all over the place and keep clouding up your own point. You seem to have a hard time grasping that the day to day tormenting was enough to drive these kids to suicide. You keep looking for another explanation and saying "it's life".

How is it you expect a 13 year old to understand "that's what life throws at you" which is an incredibly difficult concept for a 13 year old, yet you don't believe such an "underdeveloped" mind can be depressed enough to consider suicide?

This is a very conflicting point of view. Can you not see that?

I agree. It has gotten way beyond a little teasing. These children are being abused on a daily basis by other kids. I have read some of the horror stories and again think. What kind of parents raise their kids to be little monsters? It is not okay to verbally abuse, hit or punch anyone.

The children who are being bullied are not the ones have a problem.

The bullies themselves have something mentally wrong with them. And need help ASAP. It is not normal teegage behavior to walk up and slap someone in the face. Or threaten to kill them? Red Flag parents! Get your kid some help before it's too late or you'll be seeing them in prison.

 

[LuckyNumber7]

I don't think you're reading the stories right, these
kids are dealing with more than the average "mocking" or teasing. These kids are being bullied and harassed on a daily basis. That's not "what life throws at you".

I get it. I get who they were. I dont think you're accounting for the fact that this occurs much more than this. If every kid who was treated that way commited suicide at 13, there'd be a good handful of suicides every month for various different reasons. I've seen some kids be absolutely tormented socially, physically, and emotionally in school.

I'm going to go out on a limb and guess you weren't bullied that much as a kid?

Bullied? No. Rejected? Yes. I play myself a sad song on the world's smallest violin every day. I'm a lone wanderer, through thick and thin. I keep very few people close to be because of that. I still put up with it today. Yes, listen to be feeling all bad for myself. Not.

Glad that's out.

HIGHLY unlikely from what we know about suicide and depression. Also there is no evidence that these 13 year olds even knew about the other stories.

Well congratulations. Now you know what I was suggesting a few days ago.

Calm down. You're just all over the place and keep clouding up your own point. You seem to have a hard time grasping that the day to day tormenting was enough to drive these kids to suicide. You keep looking for another explanation and saying "it's life".

Good lord please dont ever tell me that I have a hard time grasping the day to day tormenting, you know nothing about me.

How is it you expect a 13 year old to understand "that's what life throws at you" which is an incredibly difficult concept for a 13 year old, yet you don't believe such an "underdeveloped" mind can be depressed enough to consider suicide?

This is a very conflicting point of view. Can you not see that?

This argument has been going around in circles since it first started. A 13 year old mind can be depressed enough to commit suicide. Nothing in these articles that you've claimed I've read wrong suggests any level of intensity (other than in the case of Asher Brown, where his parents claim he was 'bullied to death').

Besides, that's what I've been suggesting all along. That either the kid was weak spirited, it was worse than we think (i.e. something more than just being bullied, such as in the Clementi case where a specific trigger lead him to his actions following probable deep depression), or they were influenced (well, if he took his life, maybe there is no hope after all?).

 

[LuckyNumber7]

You're right. I'm wrong. I guess none of the phone calls parents make to my school, none of the instances of this reported in the news are real. They're all made up.

Yeah, cite the news. Why dont you return to high school or college then? See how things work?

Oh, that's right, I'm kinda in the middle between those two places.

Everything you see in the news is either virtually non-occuring or highly dramatized. the news jumps on that trash and feeds it to you, because they found the one middle school or high school where it happened. And you buy into it, just like they want you to.

No, before you say it that's not a conspiracy. Go ahead, live the life of a teenager. Tell me that this stuff honestly goes on as much as the media makes it appear. They're isolated events. Sure, feelings will always get hurt. Someone will cry. Someone might get hurt.

And once again, boys are much quieter when it comes to issues like that than girls are.

 

[martha]

Yeah, cite the news. Why dont you return to high school or college then? See how things work?

Can I cite the actual phone calls I get from parents? The parents of BOYS? Or don't those count?

Anderson Cooper 360: Blog Archive - Video: Bullying victims speak out ? - CNN.com Blogs

Anderson Cooper 360: Blog Archive - Dr. Phil: Bullied to death ? - CNN.com Blogs

Hope Witsell Cyberbully Suicide: Did She Have a Chance? (PICTURES) - Health Blog - CBS News

Apparently you don't know how to do a google news search, which is kind of sad.

But, I'm making all this up, and cyberbullying does not exist.

 

[martha]

No, before you say it that's not a conspiracy. Go ahead, live the life of a teenager. Tell me that this stuff honestly goes on as much as the media makes it appear. They're isolated events. Sure, feelings will always get hurt. Someone will cry. Someone might get hurt.

I was never a teenager; I went right from diapers to post-college. It was a miracle, really. I should right a book about how I skipped over the teenage years.

And yes, bullying incidents are al isolated events; those wimpy kids are just magnifying the problem. You're just that much of a badass that nothing hurts you, I guess.


I was wondering what your problem was until you identified it here:

Oh, that's right, I'm kinda in the middle between those two places.

You have the hubris of youth on your side. If it hasn't happened to you, then it hasn't happened.

 

[LuckyNumber7]

I was never a teenager; I went right from diapers to post-college. It was a miracle, really. I should right a book about how I skipped over the teenage years.

And yes, bullying incidents are al isolated events; those wimpy kids are just magnifying the problem. You're just that much of a badass that nothing hurts you, I guess.


I was wondering what your problem was until you identified it here: You have the hubris of youth on your side. If it hasn't happened to you, then it hasn't happened.

Yeah, because that's what I said. You know... I wasnt referring to teenagers nowadays. I totally meant that you were never a teenager But since we're both acting like children right now, you should go ahead and right that book. Right it day and night.

Im totally acting the badass right now. Actually, the ones you hear about, and the ones you're posting about cyber-bullying and all of that nonsense, are indeed isolated occurances. That's not regular stuff.

But I mean, you're proving my point anyways. Stand strong by your CNN, they know best.

Wait, havent you heard? All those gosh dang kids nowadays are playing that 'Grand Theft Auto'. And I saw in the news that a kid stole a car and went for a joyride. I guess that's what kids do nowadays!

You know nothing of me. Call me arrogant all you'd like, I think you're naive. You presume that because you're older you automatically know more. You also know more about the lives of teenagers than the teenagers themselves know of.

 

[anitram]

Nevermind, I'm technologically obtuse so I can't do quotes properly.

Lucky7, why you be so angry?