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Old 07-29-2009, 08:20 PM   #16
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I've always been a deranged conspiracy theorist.


At least you're an honest deranged conspiracy theorist!
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Old 07-30-2009, 12:06 AM   #17
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Er, no not really. I've always been a deranged conspiracy theorist.
Trying to figure out if this is one of those 'This sentence is true'--> / <--'That sentence is false' moments.

Well, my household would be considered 'lower middle class' by most US sociologists' income criteria, we have three kids, and I can assure you I don't consider myself to live in "penury."
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Old 07-30-2009, 02:07 PM   #18
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Stargazing

Wow, I really wanna bite into a chunk of that...
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Old 07-30-2009, 05:30 PM   #19
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If anyone wants to read it

The case against having kids - Arts & Culture Top03 - Macleans.ca


People should not be judged for choosing not to have kids. And some people have kids just to satisfy the expectations of other people, and of society at large. That's not a good reason.
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Old 07-30-2009, 05:51 PM   #20
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saying “I don’t want kids” is akin to “There’s a bomb on the plane.”
Oh puhLEEZE.
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Old 07-30-2009, 05:54 PM   #21
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Oh puhLEEZE.
Well, you have to admit that both pronouncements will sometimes bring a similar reaction:



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Old 07-30-2009, 06:08 PM   #22
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It's probably more like a snake on a plane..

But the "selfish" thing isn't fair either. As if having kids automatically makes you selfless. It's "selfish" to choose not to have kids when you know it's something you don't want to do? It's the most important decision you'll ever make, because other people are involved who didn't choose you. And who will be dependent upon you, mostly for love and all that good stuff. If you resent them well what will result?
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Old 07-30-2009, 06:11 PM   #23
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Only one person ever has told me I was selfish for not choosing to have kids. She wasn't my friend, and she couldn't have kids, so she had her own issues.

If people have friends who are calling them selfish for choosing not to have kids, those people need new friends.
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Old 07-30-2009, 06:15 PM   #24
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If people have friends who are calling them selfish for choosing not to have kids, those people need new friends.
I agree. But it's probably something that most people are polite enough not to verbalize. And maybe it's more like "what's wrong with them?" especially for women-because women are still supposed to have that intense, innate desire to procreate and to mother and to nurture in that specific way.
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Old 07-30-2009, 06:17 PM   #25
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It's really a non-issue with my circle of family and friends. It's not brought up, and really never has been except for an initial question when first meeting. "Do you have any kids?" "No." Moving on...



I don't get why people have to discuss all this shit to death. Like any of this is anyone else's business.

I'm kind of tired of this new trend to blog and write about stuff and then wonder why crackpots and busybodies get in your face about it. What happened to privacy and discretion?
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Old 07-30-2009, 06:18 PM   #26
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Only one person ever has told me I was selfish for not choosing to have kids. She wasn't my friend, and she couldn't have kids, so she had her own issues.
Not wanting to have children of your own is one thing. Not wanting to bear a child to term so others less fortunate than you could have a child is quite another.

You should be ashamed of yourself, martha.

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Old 07-30-2009, 06:20 PM   #27
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Not wanting to have children of your own is one thing. Not wanting to bear a child to term so others less fortunate than you could have a child is quite another.

You should be ashamed of yourself, martha.


I know. I'm so damn selfish.

We should have a law.....
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Old 07-30-2009, 06:20 PM   #28
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The thing is, I can tell you from experience that the same tiresome busybodies who'll hound you when you don't have kids for being "incomplete" or "selfish" are the same people who'll then turn around once you DO have kids (if you do) and lecture you about how every one of your kids' problems, from Tourette's to hyperactivity to middling grades to their adult relationships no less, are YOUR FAULT because you do this and that wrong, which, of course, WELL I NEVER would if those were MY kids. Whatever--just grit your teeth, suck it up, and charge on ahead with your life. Yes, people ought to be able to choose to either have kids or not have kids without invasive pressure or shows of disdain from others, but to the extent that you're inevitably gonna encounter that anyway, it ain't that big a deal.
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Old 07-30-2009, 06:21 PM   #29
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I guess some people just need to butt in.
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Old 07-30-2009, 06:22 PM   #30
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Well if you can butt in you don't have to focus on your own issues
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