To Edge,
Oh....
my deepest sympathies to you and your family.
I'd never read anything about your mum till now. She sounded interesting, and very supportive (first roadie!) of you, and your new band buds way back then! It is a blessing when a parent supports you in your deep goals.
As others have said this
is rough terrain, and you
might be in some manner of surreal shock off & on.
I lost my mom just a bit past 4 years ago, and
if (not clear in the news articles) it's so that this short illness was a sudden,
unexpected thing; then
it's all the more devastating. What was a previous "routine type problem" for my mom "relatively easy" to take care of in the ER suddenly had a new hidden factor, and started her downhill slide.
I know that for myself the
support of my family, AND friends got me through the worst of it. So I wish that you will have that support and gain strength from it.
If it works for you might also think of your fans' caring as an extra invisible field of energy also giving you fortitude.
And grieving is so personal; I hope you will be
able to grieve how you grieve, and not how others say you "should" do so.
RIP, Gwenda